It pains me to remind everyone . . .
BATBOY ENDORSES GOREANN ARBOR, Mich. - Bat Boy is on the loose again - and this time, the little guy is endorsing Al Gore for President! Aides scurried for cover and the Vice President’s jaw dropped in shock, sources say, when the shrieking, 2-foot, 6-inch mutant half-walked, half-flew into a Gore campaign office near here.
“Of course, we all knew who Bat Boy was,” said one campaign worker. “But we were jumpy because he has a reputation for being kind of unpredictable. And to tell you the truth, he’s even scarier-looking in person than he is in the newspaper.”
But Bat Boy, who hadn’t been seen since he escaped from a Georgia laboratory two weeks ago, quickly made it clear that his mission was a friendly one.
“Bat Boy can’t talk, of course - but he showed us in his own inimitable way that he was there to endorse our man,” the aide said. “He started screeching and excitedly pointing at a ‘Gore for President’ sign and shaking his head ‘yes, yes, yes.’
“Then he hopped over and started patting Mr. Gore on the back and shaking his head ‘yes, yes, yes’ again.
“When he spotted a bumper sticker that said, ‘I’m voting for Al Gore,’ he held it across his chest and began excitedly pointing at himself. It was clear that he was saying, ‘Yep, I’m voting for him myself.’”
Witnesses said the little refugee from the mountains of Virginia flitted around the office for 10 minutes or so, then walked over to Gore and extended his gnarled little hand. After a moment’s hesitation, the Vice President extended his and the two shook hands vigorously before stopping to pose for photographers.
Then all hell broke loose.
“He was moving toward the door and people were saying goodbye to him and I thought he was going to leave,” the Vice President recalled. “But suddenly, he shrieked and ripped off his coat and tie and shirt until he was totally bare-chested. And then he came up and gave me a ‘love bite’ on the shoulder that I’ll never forget.
“I’ll probably have a scar, but that’s OK, because I know he was just trying to be friendly.
“Then, while I was still rubbing my shoulder, he scooted out the door and just disappeared down the street.”
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