The 40-year-old Marine said goodbye again this month, leaving the house at 5:30 a.m. to board a bus for an undisclosed location. Their 12-year- daughter, Brooke, was too young to remember the gulf war, but she is all too aware of the confrontation that may lie ahead.
"She pretty much asks every day when we're going to war," said VanHorn, an aide at the USO, "so I know she's concerned."
The effect on children has become one of the area's chief concerns, prompting the creation of support groups such as "Parents Away," which offer counseling to the sons and daughters of deployed service personnel.
Most of those deployed are fathers, although an undetermined number of children are saying goodbye to mothers who are in either the Marine Corps or the Navy. In some households, say school officials, both parents may be sent overseas, forcing the children to move in with relatives or other families.
Camp Lejeune volunteers have also formed a network called "Key Wives" to assist women whose husbands are deployed. Social events such as "Sweethearts without Sweethearts" help combat the loneliness. (My Aunt does this in San Deigo. Some of these families need food, etc.)
Older wives who endured past conflicts -- from the Vietnam War to the gulf war -- often serve as surrogate mothers for younger wives who are watching their husbands depart for the first time.
The USO has installed 10 computers to enable spouses to send and receive e-mails from the conflict zone. One frequent user is Melissa Edwards, 18, who showed up at the USO last week wearing a T-shirt that read: "If you think it's hard being a Marine, try being a Marine's wife."
She and her husband, Cpl. Justin Edwards, married more than a year ago. Their first child -- already named Tatum Marie -- will arrive next month.
"It's hard knowing I'm going to have a baby without him," she said, sitting down at a computer to write another e-mail. In her electronic dispatches, she said, "I remind him he's got a little girl on the way and he'll have something to come home to."