Osso bucoNever had it, but I think it's a veal dish.
Posted on 01/27/2003 11:07:42 AM PST by Happygal
Restaurant staff are taking unsavoury revenge on celebrities who fail to tip generously. NICK FOULKES reports.
A Dubliner who worked as a waiter in New York tells the story of the time Tony Bennett came to eat. The restaurant's manager told a waitress to forget about her other tables and look after the singer's every need.
But what about my tips, she complained. I'm sure Mr Bennett will look after you, the manager reassured her. One meal and lots of attentive service later, the singer put down his tip. It fell short of the waitress's expectations. As the waiter was helping Bennett on with his coat, the waitress could restrain herself no longer. "What's the matter?" she called out. "Did you leave your wallet in San Francisco too?"
It's the kind of anecdote that will have celebrities everywhere shuddering: cross restaurant staff at your peril. Your waiter has a ringside seat on your behaviour. He or she is probably not interested if you are cheating on your spouse, your business or even your country provided you cut them in on a slice of the action. Between 15pc and 20pc of the bill should do the trick.
Now, thanks to a website called stainedapron.com, if you don't pay you may also find your parsimony pilloried on the internet. Worse, you may find out what has happened to your food during its journey from oven to table.
Address your server without what he or she judges to be proper respect, or fail to tip adequately, then chance a return visit and, according to stainedapron.com, you run the risk of ingesting insects, urine, dirt from the floor, saliva, sweat, phlegm, laxatives, breast milk and worse.
It appears that in the US waiting staff are badly paid and rely on gratuities for most of their income. But these acts of revenge are not restricted to the US. The breast milk was apparently served in the UK, and it was also in Britain that one customer who wanted a tenderised steak was allegedly treated to a slab of meat that had been given to a dog to chew on for a while.
Invariably those who receive the greatest pounding on the site are the rich and famous. Take former vice president Al Gore, who was travelling through Iowa on a publicity trip, according to an anonymous correspondent who calls himself Smiley.
"One of his aides called the restaurant and asked if we could open a little early in the morning. We agreed to come in to accommodate them. They called in at the scheduled time, and ordered $90 [€85] worth of sandwiches to go.
"Naturally, they wanted many kinds of drinks as well: juice, coffee, milk. We made sure they had more than enough silverware, condiments, etc. The aide came in to pick up and pay for the meals. Paid cash, asked for a receipt and stiffed us on a tip. Not a dime!"
Similarly unlikely to give decent tips, at least according to stainedapron.com, are Ethan Hawke, Sharon Stone, Bridget Fonda and Dan Quayle.
A Las Vegas-based contributor found himself serving a famous double act. "We had to make them their food every day. Their butler would call in the order around 3pm and the food had to be made, put on a silver platter and room service would come to pick it up.
"These guys would order stupid things like osso buco a half-hour before they wanted it (osso buco takes 12 hours to cook). One day we were getting slammed, and those guys kept demanding potatoes every half-hour; we would send the food up, only to have more immediately demanded."
At which point the potatoes were, shall we say, doctored.
But the waiters don't disapprove of all their customers. Bill Clinton, Johnny Depp, Steffi Graf, Kevin Costner, Courteney Cox and Jerry Springer are all singled out for praise.
And it is not merely tipping etiquette that gets noticed. Bill Gates allegedly visited 'Bob's Rambunctious Seafood Restaurant', where a waiter reports he ordered a root beer and fish and chips.
"He then proceeded to pick the fish into tiny pieces all over the table. As he did that he started to rock back and forth. By this time, everyone in the restaurant saw him, and the cooks checked with him to see if he liked the food. He didn't really talk to them or the managers and just seemed to want to eat and rock back and forth. He then left about $5 on a $38 bill and said on his comment card that Bob's was 'kid-friendly'."
Graham Greene said true immortality is being remembered kindly by those who survive you. So JFK Jr would surely look kindly on stainedapron.com. "Always left a ten-dollar tip," according to one informant, "with a thank you and a huge smile. Outstanding."
... and worse???? I hate to think what that might be.
There is one Japanese restaurant, and a few 'southern cooking' cafeterias that I go out to. Other than that, forget it. Even though I tip 20% consistently, I don't trust the general sanitation of the food prep area, nor the (potentially disease ridden) fags that seem to make up a disproportionate number of wait staff at most restaurants.
What the heck is osso buco? Sounds like one of those girly-boy type dishes like quiche.
Osso buco Penn and Teller?
Zigfreid and Roy?
I'm curious.
Nope, it's meat-- veal shank braised til it's falling off the bone. Good eating.
I used to waitress to get myself through college. It was very hard work sometimes serving jerks and their every need only to get a horrible, horrible tip. Plus running around all day all over the restaurant. By the end of the day my feet hurt so bad, I could bearly walk.
I know what waitresses go through, I have been there. 95% of the time I tip above and beyond 15% unless the waitress is rude or just all around a bad waitress; which I rarely find the case to be.
My whole family are good tippers. I guess it runs in the family.
Which is a lie. The real story about Algore in this article happened to the Klinton campaign in 96'. In fact, the Klinton's told the proprieter that they would pay them later and the propriter had to go to extreme lengths to get their money back, including writing the White House.
That's about 15%. What's their complaint? His eating habits? If so, they should get out of the restaurant biz. People eat like animals for the most part.
Ewwww! Now out of curiosity I have to go check out that website: stainedapron.com and see who found a cockroach in their soup (I can only hope it was Babara Steisand).
Oh, that would be sublime!
And don't forget the world's richest autistic:
He [Bill Freakin' Gates!] didn't really talk to them or the managers and just seemed to want to eat and rock back and forth.
A fair tip at about 15% is usually about $1.50 per every $10.00.
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