Regards, Ivan
"It would be very simple, Dear Leader...sorry, Mr. President..."
Posted on 01/04/2003 4:30:21 PM PST by MadIvan
It is even stranger than Dr Strangelove himself. North Korea, the Stalinist dictatorship that is threatening to plunge the world into nuclear confrontation, has quietly set up a makeshift embassy in Finchley, a north London suburb which was once the home of Peter Sellers.
The diplomatic base - the first that the Pyongyang regime has had in Britain - lies hidden inside a 1930s semi-detached house, a far cry from the grandiose symbolism more often associated with the country's "Great Leader", Kim Jong-Il.
The choice of a borough that was previously best known as the former constituency of Lady Thatcher and as the home of the late Mr Sellers, might appear fitting, given the actor's acclaimed performances in the film Dr Strangelove, in which he played a number of characters - including a demented scientist who conspires with an insane general to start a nuclear war.
It has, however, astounded local residents, who were yesterday coming to terms with the discovery that representatives of one of the world's most sinister regimes were dwelling on their doorstep just days after Pyongyang incurred the wrath of America, and attracted worldwide condemnation, for re-starting its nuclear programme.
Brian Fadden, a 29-year-old manager who lives opposite the Koreans, said: "It's incredible that the nice man from over the road is a part of the axis of evil. I thought he must own a restaurant because I have seen him carrying in boxes of food. Perhaps he was shipping it home for his family."
Stella Antoniou, a 43-year-old housewife, who also lives nearby, could scarcely believe who her neighbours were. "I thought they might work somewhere nice because they dress so smartly, but I thought it might be in a nearby office. I hope this does not affect house prices," she said.
David Smith, the vice president of the Finchley Society, was similarly bewildered. "Our claim to fame is that Gracie Fields once lived here. The road is just an average suburban place of small homes, not really a place for Stalinists," he said.
The three-bedroom house in Sandringham Gardens, London N12, which has been rented by the North Koreans for the past year, has pebble-dashed walls and rose and rhododendron bushes growing in the tiny front garden. It was initially both a home and an office for two North Koreans, according to the Foreign Office, although three more comrades quietly arrived in November.
The bland appearance of the "embassy" means that there has, so far, been little attention from neighbours. Instead of the satellite dishes and pictures of Korean revolutionary leaders that one might expect to find, there are merely thick net curtains and sketches of flowers on the walls.
This desire for anonymity, coupled, no doubt, with the North Koreans' traditional instinct for secrecy, was evident last week when The Telegraph sought to interview An Son Yong, one of the "ambassadors". Wearing casual clothes far removed from the regulation grey Mao jackets still worn by most North Korean officials, he politely took declined our offer.
"I would like to talk to you and ask you inside because it is New Year but there are others in the hierarchy who must be contacted before I can," he said to our interpreter.
Mr An referred to President Kim as a man who supports free expression - a claim disputed by recent visitors to North Korea who say that the dials on radios are jammed by the state to stop the population listening to news reports from other countries.
"The Great Leader has always emphasised that journalists have to use the pen of justice. He says they should be impartial, but many are not," Mr An said.
After 10 minutes of politely turning down requests for an interview, he began to relax while his wife cooked a Korean fish dish in the kitchen. He said that he had been in Britain for a year as a representative of the North Korean government, but could not yet speak English. "I have learnt that the view of my country is that we are very unfriendly. We are not."
His mood changed when the interpreter, a South Korean woman, referred to his country as North Korea. "It is the Democratic People's Republic of Korea. It is not North Korea. You are not giving it its proper name!" he shouted, before ordering her off the property.
Other North Korean diplomats, including Ri Si Hong, the charge d'affaires, declined to be interviewed.
The diplomats' landlady, Maria Lipizzi, said: "They are nice people. The only thing is they sometimes fall behind on their [rent]. They always pay eventually, though."
A spokesman for the local council said that its officials had not been notified that the property was being used as a temporary embassy. "If there is a complaint from a resident we will look at it."
Regards, Ivan
"It would be very simple, Dear Leader...sorry, Mr. President..."
I'm thinking: door-to-door dildo salesman, drunk mormon missionary, signing them up for chutney-ferret porn magazine subscriptions, panty of the month club, burning paper bag full of dog poo on the doorstep, 50 lbs of .25" ball bearings scattered on the lawn (for the mowers) "Registered Sex Offender Lives Here" signs, road kill in the mailboxes...
And then we move into the surreal...one hundred nuns rollerblading up and down the sidewalk
Peter Sellers would have enjoyed THAT!!! ;-)
Regards, Ivan
What a scam - embassy my eye. The landlady comes around complaining that the rent is late, and they start shouting "Diplomatic immunity!" and pretending that they don't speak English. "North Korean diplomats" - gimme a break...
:^)
?
I am SO out of the loop...
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