[demlosers]

#include "EULA.h"
#include "NSA_libraries.h"
#include "Version_obsolecence.h"

char make_prog_look_big(2000000000);

main () {

if (detect_LINUX())
freeze;
if (detect_cache())
disable_cache();
if (fast_CPU())
set_wait_states(lots);

set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
set_mouse(action, jumpy);
set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
set_icons(ugly);

display(Windoews_XP_Splash_screen);

while (1) {
sleep(5);
get_user_input();
sleep(5);
act_on_user_input();
sleep(5);
switch ( detect_condition() ) {
case NEW_WINDOEWS_VERSION_AVAILABLE:
trash_registry();
break;
case NEW_EULA_AVAILABLE:
trash_registry();
break;
case NORMAL:
system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp", O_CREATE);
break;
case IMPORTANT_WORD_DOCUMENT:
crash(BLUE_SCREEN_OF_DEATH);
break;
case PLAYING_MP3_FILE:
download("http://riaa.com/hollywood/fatcat/copyprotection.exe");
break;
case RUNNING_BENCHMARK:
adjust_time(APPEAR_SHORTER);
continue;
case LOOMING_MICROSHAFT_STOCK_OFFERING:
generate_document(ANALYST_RECOMMENDATION);
continue;
case RANDOM:
generate_error_number(RANDOM);
display_error_box();
freeze;
continue;
default:
download("http://www.microshaft.com/free/todaysvirus.exe");
}
}
return(trashed_system);
}

I think the code should be repeated here. It's a riot LOL!

[altair]

char make_prog_look_big(2000000000);

This is not only a syntax error (the parens should be square brackets for an array declaration) but it won't make the program look big. Unitialized globals are put into BSS which is allocated when the executable is loaded and unless the compiler and linker are really, really stupid will have zero effect on executable size.

$ ll bss?
-rwxr-xr-x    1 altair   altair       2916 Dec 12 09:52 bss1
-rwxr-xr-x    1 altair   altair       2916 Dec 12 09:52 bss2
$ size bss?
   text    data     bss     dec     hex filename
    839     260    1032    2131     853 bss1
    839     260 10000032        10001131         989aeb bss2
$ cat bss1.c
char dummy[1000];

int
main(int argc, char *argv[])
{
        return 0;
}
$ cat bss2.c
char dummy[10000000];

int
main(int argc, char *argv[])
{
        return 0;
}
$