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2002-07-18
In defense of Hootie Johnson and Augusta

Let me preface this article, no nevermind I am not prefacing it. I don't like golf. I don't like to play it. I don't like to watch it. I do like to watch Mickelson choke and Duval crumble, but if it isn't a major on Sunday, I don't even slow down the remote. BUT....

I do agree with Hootie Johnson's blasting of Martha Burk, chairman of the National Council of Women's Organizations, in response to her letter to allow women into Augusta National. "There may well come a day when women will be invited to join our membership, but that timetable will be ours and not at the point of a bayonet." Good for Johnson. (I just can't bring myself to call anyone "Hootie" anymore).

Frankly I am all for equality, but equality just to prove a point is ludicrous. Martha Burk is simply trying to stir up trouble for trouble's sake and I, for one, am sick of it. It brings to mind the time I tried to join the League of Women Voters and got denied. Hell I thought there would
be more chicks there than in the general populace, but alas I was shunned. Do you see how ridiculous "equality" and "political correctness" are becoming? Let's just destroy everything. Every club. Every fraternal organization. Every Friday night poker game between buddies. Every Canasta game between women. "Going to get a facial with the girls, honey? Well great, Earl and I are coming too."

Why can't people understand that there has to be some separation? Is it that tough? You lose the "individuality" of the group or club when you let anyone in. If they start letting women in Augusta National, then the first thing I am going to do is send a letter to Hootie and get Reverend Jesse Jackson on my side to go down there and campaign for admission for the poor. Sure the dues cost twice as much as my yearly salary, but how dare you exclude me? I am a person. I belong in "Club People" like everyone else.

What I would love is if the backlash from this led to more men pulling a "Juwanna Man" and complaining about not being able to be in the WNBA or on the Women's Golf Tour. I guarantee there is a guy who works at Hardees who could play in the WNBA for 5 times his minimum wage job. And there is a club pro making $40,000 per year who would love the big paychecks/endorsement opportunities of the women's pro golf tour. People are not the same, no matter how much anyone would like to believe it. We are all different. And then we are drawn together by common characteristics. That is not racism or sexism, that is fact(ism). But every time you turn around, people want to steal our freedom to associate with the people we choose to. And in my book, that is every bit as bad as racism or sexism.

Stand-Up Sports