[Lonesome in Massachussets]

Sorta, but I actually want an answer.

[Dog]

Cheese bite my sister...

[HairOfTheDog]

So you have solved all the other questions in life and are down to this? Great! Maybe you can help me with the basics...

Where are all my missing socks?
Why does hot water freeze faster than cold water?
What do all the function keys at the top of my keyboard do? - I am afraid to push them.

[X-FID]

Everbody hates carets, but they're good for you.