Don't Wait To Write Your Masterpiece, Send A Message Now

ToogoodReports ^ | May 7, 2002 | Debbie Daniel

[Starmaker]

I remember the days following all four fatal attempts to demoralize us as a nation and the many pictures of the victims appearing in the New York Times each day. There was much praise bestowed on so many folks; individuals would write eulogies that were printed and dedicated to a friend, family, or maybe even an acquaintance. I read those pages over and over and devoured every kind thought.

I pondered in my mind whether or not any of the deceased ever heard these same praises in their lifetime. Did the husband have the same desire to bestow the loving and kind adulation on his wife before her death as was given afterwards? Did friends speak of friends with such cherished words before they were gone? Do we wait until the funerals to speak so highly of others?

Sometimes we want to wait until it's the right moment, or when we can sit and put it all together in a "really" meaningful way . . . we want to pen the "masterpiece" that says it all and makes it very special.

The "masterpieces" I usually hear are at the graveside service, and I say to myself, "Wow, that person must have been extraordinary, I never heard such glorious words before." And so it goes . . . but not usually to the one who would benefit the most. Why do we do that?

The real "masterpiece" is the thoughts you have on your heart right now about another living human being. And it takes a "master effort" to be courageous enough to deliver those thoughts. It's not always easy to stop a co-worker in the hall and say, "I just want you to know how much I enjoy working with you," or "Your life has been a great influence on mine." We just can't bring ourselves to do that — it's too awkward. If you really "need" or feel that you "have" to express sentiments to someone, you'd rather send a greeting card and let it do the job for you.

The horror of 9/11 was a "watershed" for me. I don't care if individuals question this forthright behavior — I want them to know what they mean to my life. I can't live with myself if I put it off, only to see it printed in their eulogy. If I can't share kind thoughts to a person's face, why share them with a casket?

As we approach Mother's Day, I am reminded of the many mothers who were killed on that fateful day last September — leaving behind children and loved ones; and so many children and loved ones have now gone to war leaving behind mothers. The thoughts and well wishes of loved ones may never have been expressed to those who were killed in the tragedy of 9/11. That "day of death" haunts me in so many ways that I find myself encouraging people everyday to sit down and write the letter, make the phone call, or even leave a message on voice mail. If something happens to you, what a lovely gift you've left behind. We never know.

There are hundreds and thousands of people who are now a part of the residual effect of 9/11. I, myself, have four members in my family who are serving in the military and won't be with their mothers on this special day.

Don't wait to write the "masterpiece" . . . send your message now. The kindhearted thoughts you have of others need to be expressed. Can you do it? Whatever gestures of fondness you would share at a friend or loved one's funeral, do it today. What good is it to express your gratitude to those that are gone.

I am so convinced we are going to witness some startling events in the next six months that I find myself mentally preparing for it everyday. There are those that tell me to stop talking like that, and others just laugh and say, "Naw, the worst has already come . . . that's as bad as it's gonna' get."

There is something deep inside of me that "gnaws" at my very being and keeps these thoughts stirring. I pray to G-d it's not true and I don't really talk about it much, but it's there. And it's not a "fear" from listening to the news, it's a "reality" I believe in and feel to be true.

It is morbidly uncomfortable to think about a situation like this. As long as someone is smiling and breathing, we delude ourselves into believing they will be with us forever.

I'm going to say this again, "The next six months could bring about some of the most horrible events we may ever witness." Send or voice your masterpieces NOW. If I'm portending something that never happens, I will cherish being wrong. But if it does, then some beautiful thoughts were shared and many lives affected by your kind words.

The words you share today may be the only masterpiece someone ever hears.

"Hello Mother, I just called to say I love you. Happy Mother's Day!"

"Yes, I know I'm early, but I wanted to call today."

To comment on this article or express your opinion directly to the author, you are invited to e-mail Debbie at dddtx@yahoo.com .