Left Coast Report

A bootleg version of the film "Black Hawk Down" recently debuted in Mogadishu, Somalia, according to the Associated Press.

Reports tell of Somali men cheering as they watched the movie, but not for what America-loving folks might think. It seems that cheers arose when U.S. helicopters got hit by Somali gunfire.

Not surprisingly, there was no audience reaction when Somalis were killed or wounded.

Somalia is known for housing a U.S. government-listed terrorist organization called Al-Itihaad. The country is often mentioned as a future destination in the War on Terror.

The Left Coast Report predicts that if the same Somali audience gets a sneak peek at authentic footage of a sure-to-come visit from the U.S. military, reactions will be a lot less jovial.

It could have been a "Taco Supreme," but instead the U.S. Supreme Court has decided not to get involved in what is described in one lawyer's brief as "a tale of two dogs."

Two Michigan men claim that the fast-food restaurant chain Taco Bell stole their idea. They insist that they are the real creators of "Psycho Chihuahua," a talking-dog character.

In a set of decisions that pits state law against federal copyright law, an appeals court has reversed a lower court ruling and kicked the case back to trial court.

The Taco Bell Chihuahua has been the subject of controversy because some groups feel that the diminutive dog promotes a negative stereotype.

The Left Coast Report fears that the dispute may have to be resolved in an alternative forum since the Democrats are holding up appointments of judges. Ready for Celebrity Chihuahua Death Match?

Actor James Woods is known for speaking his mind. The star of "Casino," "Nixon" and, more recently, "Riding in Cars with Boys" told a Los Angeles television station that people who harbor terrorists should be "wiped off the face of the earth."

But Woods didn't stop there. He went on to say, "The only way to stop a terrorist is to cut his head off." He also used the term "diaper-heads" to refer to the evildoers.

According to zap2it.com, Jean Abinader, managing director for the Arab American Institute, responded to the remarks by saying, "I think Mr. Woods is off his medication. Only a lunatic would speak like this."

The Left Coast Report is pretty sure that the managing director forgot to check the P.C. manual for the word "lunatic."

Danny Provenzano, co-writer, director and star of the movie "This Thing of Ours," once said that organized crime was something that people made up for the movies. But now Povenzano has apparently gotten mixed up in a true organized crime story. So indicates the Associated Press.

Provenzano's new movie melds an Internet heist with organized crime. Vincent Pastore of "The Sopranos" and Frank Vincent of "Goodfellas" play major roles, and James Caan of "Godfather" fame makes a cameo appearance.

Now in a real-life crime drama, the actor has been charged with racketeering and conspiracy to commit murder. The offenses carry a potential sentence of up to 60 years in prison.

The actor claims accusers owe him thousands of dollars and are making up the allegations because of his family links to organized crime.

Provenzano says he's eager to put the charges behind him and get on with his film career.

The Left Coast Report notes Provenzano is in high-profile Hollywood company. Putting charges behind and getting on with careers is a favorite pastime of a lot of celebs.

The New York Post is reporting that the same firm that brought MTV's "The Real World" to the small screen has yet another reality show in store for us. And this one's name tells it all: "Who Wants to be a Playboy Playmate?"

Twelve contestants, picked from a search of six U.S. cities, will be caught on tape for two weeks as they live together in Los Angeles and attend photo shoots.

Competition promises to be stiff as contestants vie to win the coveted spot of Playboy Playmate.

Apparently, producers are talking with all of the major broadcast networks about the possibility of airing the show.

The Left Coast Report hopes that the expected skinfest will be limited to late-night or subscription television. Could a "Playmate Fear Factor" be too far behind?

ABC plans to bring in a midseason drama series to the tube called "The Court." Viewers will have to decide for themselves if the show's concept is distinguishable from CBS's portrayal of the Supreme Court, "First Monday."

The show is likely to hold more left-leaning hopes for what the judicial system ought to look like.

In "The Court," Hal Holbrook plays a powerful, conservative chief justice. His counterpart in "First Monday" is a staunchly conservative character played by James Garner.

The Left Coast Report cautions viewers not to expect that either show will enlighten Americans on the true constitutional role of the judiciary. Rather, look out for a TV consensus that unelected judges make great legislators.

The cable news networks' game of musical chairs continues. Paula Zahn has jumped from Fox to CNN. Greta Van Susteren has swung over from CNN to Fox. And Alan Keyes has vaulted from a presidential campaign post to MSNBC host.

Sources indicate that CNN is looking to create a "star system" of exciting personalities. Chung is known for her high-profile interview with beleaguered congressman Gary Condit. And many still remember her highly criticized interview with Newt Gingrich's mother.

The Left Coast Report would like to let CNN know that ratings have more to do with impartial reporting than with big-name personalities. But that's "just between you and me."

Five Mile River Films, whose previous productions featured such revered figures as Abraham, Moses and David, has purchased the screen rights to a biography of former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani. So says the Associated Press.

The bio, "Rudy Giuliani: Emperor of the City," is slated to be made into a TV movie, with plans for a worldwide release.

Robert Duvall, Daniel Travanti and James Woods all have a shot at playing the role of Giuliani.

The president's niece, Lauren Bush, who has graced the cover of many a fashion magazine, is set to make an appearance at Central Perk. Lauren has landed a minor role in an episode of the hit comedy show "Friends."

Apparently the model-turned-actress performs well on tape, because producers are considering a permanent role for the 17-year-old beauty.

The Left Coast Report hears that Lauren's uncle advised her not to eat the coffee house pretzels.

The Left Coast Report is put together by James L. Hirsen and the staff of NewsMax.

But Woods didn't stop there. He went on to say, "The only way to stop a terrorist is to cut his head off." He also used the term "diaper-heads" to refer to the evildoers. HMMMMMMM is Mr. Woods a Freeper?? I believe freepers were the first ones to label the taliban "DIAPER-HEADS". OBTW, I just saw the movie and I'm seeing RED!! Even though our guys came out of there, our Elite Forces got whipped BAD and 19 died. I HATE THE MEDIA CLYMERS for NOT reporting this incident when it happened. They were too busy kissing kkklinton's butt to report the truth. BOY, if this would have happened during a Republican Prez. the media EXCREMENTS would have been all over this like they are on the ENRON crap. The blame WAS NEVER directed at the Rapist in Chief! People that see this movie will come out of there blaming the General who was in charge of the operation. I just hope our military learned from this experience. God Bless our servicemen may our Father in heaven keep them safe!

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.