Hi! I'm Bill O'Reilly. Thanks for tuning in. Today we'll continue my massive drive to get SUV's taxed. Then I'll complain how the Government it unjustly taxing us all to death. Them I'll whine about the massive Government bueracracy and how its not working. Then at the top of the next hour I'll demand that the Government take over the airlines. All this on my show today.
You know people, how any of you dullards can hope to survive without buying my new book, 'O'Rielly: I Know More Than You, Because I Have A TV And Radio Show'. I'm telling ya that you NEED this book. You and your family will suffer unless you buy it! Also no reading is complete without the new 'Radio Factor Boxer Shorts!' I mean these are so comfortable that you'll have to buy 2 pairs, one for you and one for your wife just to make your marrage work. And life is not complete without 'The Factor Colonic Home Kit'. These have been flying off the shelf and for you not to clean out your insides after my retoric and common sense crap disguised as genius cleans out your soul, is just unconsciable! So pick them up and also order the new 'Factor Early Home Pregnancy Test Kit!' We also have drink coasters as well as the new 'Factor Nose Hair Shavers' and 'Factor Anal Wart Extractors!' All this you need or you'll die!
Now for todays talking points....oh, I just did them. Buy my stuff because if I can't get enough of me, then neither can you!
Well said and accurate too!