My mother tells a story of a day while my dad was serving in Saigon in 1969. She said that one day two airmen knocked at our door. When she opened it and saw there were two of them, she slammed the door in their face without saying a word or giving them a chance to say one themselves. It took them a couple of seconds to realize what she thought they were there for before one of them finally was able to call in to her and explain that they weren't from the group that notifies the relatives of casualties. I can't remember what they were there for now. (I was six at the time and don't remember it myself.) It took my mom a few minutes to settle down after that one.
Based on this, I know for a fact that you're not exaggerating in the least.
I hope your husband and son return to you soon in full health and good spirits.
Gamma
Two years ago my brother and sister-in-law went out to dinner and a movie, when they turned the corner to their house a Navy car was in their driveway.
Two Navy personnel had been waiting hours for them to return to tell them that their son Philip was killed(accident) aboard ship.
Needless so say they were both devastated.
I went home to arrange with the Navy to get Philip home and his funeral, my brother could not do this.....he still has not recovered from his son's death.
So everyday I say a little prayer for all our soldiers and their families that they may never have to go through this.....