Free Cheese Pairings Guide!! - Know Your Cheeses and How to Pair Them with Wine and Food!

American Dairy Association ^

[kAcknor]

kAcknor Sez:

"Good morning.
"Morning Sir! Welcome to the National Cheese Emporium!"
"Ah, thank you my good man."

Cheeshop.wav 600K (But worth it!)

"tIqIpqu' 'ej nom tIqIp" (Hit them hard and hit them fast.)

Basic HTML help for new FR posters. <Ver 1.4>

[riley1992]

Someone found their thrill on Blueberry Hill and someone else was in Strawberry Fields Forever. Personally, I say go with Cold Duck mixed with Kool-Aid. Served me well in my teens and I never had a complaint one from my guests.

[NeoCaveman]

Anyone want to start a pool on how high this cheese thread will go?

I guess 250, Is this cheese cheddar?

[xzins]

Cold Duck mixed with Kool-Aid

Duck-Aid!

sounds like a willy nelson benefit for farm animals.

[Old Professer]

As the U.S. population increased, so did theetite for cheese

Did you transcribe this? The sentence above must have originally read:

As the U.S. population increased, so did their appetite for cheese

[HairOfTheDog]

Mad Dawg.... Top of the evening to you!!!

[1Old Pro]

I just copied it, I didn't edit it.

[Roebucks]

A cheese thread with less than 50 replies?

My Fuzzy Blue Velveeta

The kids were all a-screamin' for some lunch, or was it snack?
There was Dave and Pablo, Bob and Ray, Katherine, Jill, and Mac,
after whom chimed in the others: Suzy, Jacky, and Conchita,
So I went and got my fuzzy blue Velveeta.

We don't know how it was done,
'cause Velveeta doesn't spoil. (Not even in the sun!)
Those folks at Kraft are clever, they've really got it made
with cheese that doesn't ... biodegrade.

It's sealed tight in the fridge, with "Toxic" on the label.
A few adults and children are the only ones who're able
to stomach and survive a toasted whole-wheat pita
filled with my fuzzy blue Velveeta.

We don't know how it was done,
'cause Velveeta doesn't spoil. (Not even in the sun!)
Those folks at Kraft are clever, they've really got it made
with cheese that doesn't ... biodegrade.

Maybe 'twas a chemist with an enzyme never seen,
Perhaps it was the work of an engineered gene.
All we know is our enemies will always be defeata
if forced-fed my fuzzy blue Velveeta.

[Roebucks]

It's only at 49. :(

[Uncle Miltie]

The Taco Bell Chihuahua, a Doberman and a Bulldog are in a doggie bar having a drink when a good-looking female Collie comes up to them and says, "Whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me."

So the Doberman says, "I love liver and cheese." The Collie says, "That's not good enough."

The Bulldog says, "I hate liver and cheese." She says, "That's not creative."

Finally, with his Mexican accent, the Chihuahua says, "Liver alone......cheese mine."

[NeoCaveman]

It's only at 49. :(

I guess it's not the right time of the year for cheese... who would have guessed. LOL

[LonePalm]

May I suggest an aged Velvetta .

While it only bears a passing resemblance to cheese, Velveeta can be put to good use.

1. It makes a passable door stop or bookend for cookbooks.
2. If frozen, it makes a good wheel chock while changing a tire.
3. It can even be eaten. When cut into cubes and mixed with a can of Rotel tomatoes and microwaved until soft, it makes a decent dip for corn chips. The mixture makes awesome grilled cheese sandwiches.

Merry Christmas Y'all!

Garde la Foi, mes amis! Nous nous sommes les sauveurs de la République! Maintenant et Toujours!
(Keep the Faith, my friends! We are the saviors of the Republic! Now and Forever!)
LoanPalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)

[Roebucks]

Hey there!

Surely Jeff Foxworthy knows that velveeta is the cheese of choice by rednecks everywhere. Think about it.

No country club pubbie or elistest democrat would be caught dead with velveeta in their meal.

It's cheap, spreads good and tastes fine and most importantly, goes down good with beer.

Cheese food- cheese = food.

[PoorMuttly]

So...does or doesn't this book include Moosecheese? I needs to know, because I just rec'd a large New Years shipment, and must order around 900 gallons of whatever wine goes best with it.

Boy, news of this excellent book got here just in time. Y'know, disappointed Hells Angels can be unpleasant if their cuisine isn't right up to international standards. I trust you guys, so I'm publishing my home address, so they can all come over and have a culturally superb holiday this year.

[Ernest_at_the_Beach]

Imagine -- articles on the Cheese Topic bump list -- about Cheese/ annd its not a vanity!

Good stuff - I love cheese !

[Wake up and smell the cheese]

Hey! I already got mine! I sent off for it a while back and got it in the mail about a week ago. I've been playing with it ever since! LOL