While SOME of what you say is, no doubt, true, I would hasten to point out that in many, many cases the woman is the one who initiates the divorce due to the fact that hubby has gotten into the habit of having his cake (home life, wife, children) and eating it (girlfriend, bars, drinking buddies, etc.), too. Not all (nor, maybe even, mostly all), but a great many. Also, when you see REAL incidents of "domestic" violence, it is generally the man who is the perpetrator and I'm not talking about all the poor guys who have only been "accused" of this by some vindictive, slutty, moron of a "wife".
Now then, having gotten THAT out of the way, I see the REAL problem that is contributing to the high divorce rate as lack of morality and spirituality. I think that all would agree that we saw the divorce rate (AND pre-marital sex rate) spiral in wake of God and Christian morality being systematically removed from schools and public life. People no longer believe that sex is something to be shared WITHIN a LIFE-LONG marriage as ordained by God. Sex is to have "fun" and thus, nothing is sacred to a marriage between a man and a woman. Nowadays, marriage is not really viewed as an "until death do us part" committment. It is viewed more as a "until I see something better" arrangement. The FACT is, that more men seem to be "straying" than their spouses. Let's all be realisic here, shall we? Women (espcially after giving birth to two or three children) tend to lose a lot of that svelt figure (too tired to exercise at the end of the day - espcially if she's having to work outside the home as well as deal with the needs of little ones in the evenings and at night), she doesn't have as much free time to "pay attention" to that "fragile" male ego nor does she often-times have the energy to desire sex (although she would probably still like to cuddle and snuggle). The men, in the mean time, see the expanding waist-line and lack of attention to them as total disinterest and begin to (maybe) unconsciencely seek the attention of another woman. If/when they DO receive this "outside" attention, they carry things too far (an affair, etc.) and then when the wifey finds out and files for divorce, SHE gets blames for "initiating" said proceedings.
Now, I realize that to a large part, this is an over-simplification, but it is entirely too prevalent to dismiss completely (and yes, I DO know that this door swings both ways). Until we can get back to seeing divorce as a BAD thing and until we can start re-teaching our children the REAL meaning and responsibilities of marriage, we will see this trend continue and the nanny-state government providing a "safety-net" only makes the entire "single parent" thing more viable.
Morality means little to them. Commitment means nothing. Our society has become one of sex for pleasure only. We have a shallow society. People seek meaning in life, but they cannot find it. Look at how many people are on drugs now. They look for pleasure and happiness, but these things are like puffs of smoke. They cannot grasp it. They can see it, but when they try to close their hands on the smoke, it wafts between their fingers.
Such is our modern life.
Actually, the increase in the pre-marital sex rate closely parallels with the acceptance of and increased usage of the Pill. Contraception (especially the non-barrier kind) severed the link between procreation and sex in a lot of people's minds.
I, like you, am somewhat put off by all of the accounts of horrible wives that are frequently made by Freeper males. (And they tend to confirm the stereotype of conservatives as angry, white males. )Is it possible that American women are the pampered, demanding, inconsiderate witches as they are so often described? Perhaps, but my guess is that there are a lot of unrealistic expectations about marriage out there, also.
Sounds like you have it all worked out...I notice women do that alot...Perfectly good reasons to ignore what he wants, but still expecting to have her needs served. Did I mention the ubiquitous condesention?