[Rash32]

My cousin is a hopeless liberal but I would very much like to put him in his place with a short one or two line responce. I thought fellow Freepers could help me deliver the proper responce to my cousin's diatribe.

[Balding_Eagle]

Well, at least your problem makes my cousin look like a walk in th park.

Gator Girl has the winning entry by a mile! (How the heck did she DO that so fast?)Did your cousin list the email addresses the letter was going to?

Just send Gators letter to them too, along with a note explaing that you are just having a bit of fun. Responding with logic and facts is a wasted effort. Laughing at your cousins letter, and inviting others to laugh with you will be the most effective way to put an end to the annual grilling.

[Hildy]

OK, I have the perfect response...This will REALLY piss him off....Tell him that you're sorry he's so unhappy and that you'll pray for him every day. HEE HEE HEE.

[womanvet]

If I wrote at all, I would send a nice Christian card, and remind him that Jesus suffered and died for our sins. Then add a line that you are certain that Jesus was grateful for the extra sufferring he endured to forgive your cousin for his unbelievable stupidty and veniality. Make sure to ask him which poor family received his $600 refund check.

Since the checks went only to the rich, you might ask him to give you some money, since he was rich enough to get money returned.

OR

You could put the letter back in an envelope with some Tide detergent powder, and a note that there was so much sh*t in his letter, you thought he should launder it before sending it out again.

[Torie]

Mix and match as you will. Here is my go at it:

Thanks for the note. You should really turn over to the FBI the information you have about the source of the anthrax, since you appear to have information to which no one else is privy. I won't probe too deeply and inquire as to why.

I appreciate that you are hard wiring as to your hostility to certain forms of religious belief, but one thought for you. A religiously tinged education is perhaps better than no real education at all, too which so many kids are now subjected in the current version of secular nirvana. If you have a plan that realistically addresses this tragic failure that does not involve vouchers, I would love to hear it.

Regarding your elliptical slam on the stimulus package, I agree it should be interred, although not for the same reasons as you. It appears that the recession which your party is counting on is going to have a very short half life. This we can skip the pork out the bill has become with equanimity. Just like with a diet, less is more, and good for you too. I do regret your investment loses though. You should diversify more, both financially and intellectually. Stay well.

[chnsmok]

Please post his email address. I am a senior citizen in need of prescription medicine help.

[Sgt_Schultze]

...Yep, Bush is flushing 10 years of prosperity down the toilet faster than you can say Hail Mary!...

Remind him that his apparent hero, the rapist x42 served only eight years. Thank him for recognizing that the recovery actually started under George W's father and for having the strength to ignore the loudmouth partisans who still blame Bush41 for a poor economy that was a fantastic invention of clinton/carville.

[PA Engineer]

After reading all of the posts I think you should just post his email address and ask for a Freep. ;-)

[brat]

I'd simply ignore the cousin----it would be the most punishing thing you could do. Someone like that needs attention, so don't give it to him. It'll drive him crazy!

[zeaal]

Truly, Rash32, this really is your cousin's Christmas letter? Is it a form letter? The kind that is copied and goes out to everyone?

If so, this person is manic, immature and not very well informed. Whew!

ps - Will you be spending the Holiday Season with this person? If so, bop him on the top of the head, a la Three Stooges Style, for the FREEPERS!

[GeronL]

How about that experts agree that the recession started long before the election of 2000. Ask him why he thinks Sept 11 is alright? He didn't even mention the attack...

[bootless]

What would Miss Manners say? She would say that it is never appropriate to use a holy day (or even a holiday for the non-religious) to espouse one's political beliefs, as it makes the recipients uncomfortable (and embarrassed, but surely the Gentle Reader realizes that one would never say that). It is akin to forcible prosetelyzing (sp?), and therefore, unwelcome.

This is a holiday letter that displays bad taste in the extreme.

And besides, Cuz is a bitter, left-wing loony weenie.

[BJungNan]

Your cousin sounds like a real idiot. I agree with whoever said, avoid him at the family dinner.

[GeronL]

write your own christmas letter ! =o)

[My Favorite Headache]

This was hillarious...LMFAO. I would just say Merry Christmas and if you don't like it this year just wait! You have 7 more to go!

[sweetliberty]

It is very difficult to broaden one's horizons from inside a box!

[homeschool mama]

Your cousin is whacked.

[Rain-maker]

What a kook! The enconomy was capitulating before the elections. I suppose he thinks those tech/internet stocks were worthy investments when they showed no earnings. Yahoo stock at $300/share and I suppose he bought some!...LOL

I suppose you have to blame someone when your too dense to take responsibility for your own half-witted actions!

[Rainbow Rising]

If it were my cousin I would simply write back:

Dear Cousin {Name}, Thank you so much for your recent letter. What a refreshing change it was from the usual, boring, "Merry Christmas and Happy New Year" letters I'm used to getting from family. Who needs to hear about Christmas this time of year, anyway? It's always more interesting to read what passes for political thought on the Left these days.

Judging from your overall tone of self-satisfaction and smugness, you are obviously quite pleased with yourself, and doggone it why shouldn't you be? You have managed to swallow and then regurgitate every single cliche, prejudice and bit of propaganda put forth by the Left. Why, I'll bet you've even convinced yourself that these are your own ideas, and that they demonstrate how independent you are! Wow! It must be so difficult to be forced to share the earth with people who are less enlightened than you. Someday you must tell me how you manage to do it.

In the meantime, dear Cousin, I guess I'll have to muddle through as best I can. It's not easy for me, I'll admit. I'm not blessed with your gift of unquestioning belief in everything the Left preaches. No, sadly I have been saddled with this tendency to think for myself, and this has led me rather far away from what the Left preaches. Ah well, perhaps someday you will share with me your secret of getting through life without actually thinking. Until then, I guess I'll just have to keep using my head for something other than a hat rack.

Be well, Cousin.

Yours truly, etc.

[Sunnyvale CA Eng.]

There have been many good ideas here. I would also mention to your cousin that you donated money (from your tax rebate) to FreeRepublic.com - in his name (of course). And also be sure to send him a gift subscription to the Limbaugh Letter or National Review..or perhaps a gift membership to the NRA.. etc.

[KneelBeforeZod]

My condolences. My sister is a full blown commie. She has a painting of "Che" ON her bedroom wall.

That is to say on the wall itself...not hung on the wall...