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To: ChemistCat
A man who suspected his wife of cheating came home from work early one day. Sure enough, his wife was naked and the bed was unkempt. "Where is he!" The man shouted, "I know he's still here." The man looked around the apartment then checked the balcony, where he found Colin Powell hanging from the railing.

In a rage the man pushed Colin Powell off the 15th floor balcony. When he peered over the edge and saw that Colin Powell had survived the fall, he went into the kitchen, pushed the refrigerator onto the balcony and over the edge. The refrigerator landed on Colin Powell and killed him.

At the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter asked Mr. Powell how he got there. Mr. Powell said, "I was lifting weights on the balcony of my 16th floor apartment. I slipped and fell over the edge but was fortunate enough to grab onto the balcony railing of the apartment below me. Then this crazy guy pushed me off. I barely survived the fall, then the maniac threw a refrigerator on me, and here I am." St. Peter said, "OK, then you can come in." A moment later Bill Clinton arrived at the Pearly Gates, and St. Peter asked him how he got there. Bill Clinton said, "OK, picture this. I'm naked in a refrigerator...."

51 posted on 11/27/2001 10:23:45 PM PST by schmelvin
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To: schmelvin
Ok, ok, Bill Clinton joke time? Try this one...

Clinton and Pope John Paul II die on the same day and through an administrative screw up the Pope winds up at the gates of hell. Satan recognizes the Pope and asks what he did to deserver eternal damnation. The Pope allows that he doesn't really know, so Satan goes and checks. He comes back a few minutes later, all apologetic, and explains the mix up. "I'll fix it," Satan says, "But it will take about a day for the paper work to go through." "No problem," replies the Pope. So he spends his day ministering to the tormented souls of hell.

The next morning Satan takes the Pope to a long escalator, shakes his hand, wishes him well, and sends him up. Hald way up to heaven he meets Clinton on his way down. They stop and chat for a moment. Clinton assures the Pope that Heaven IS all it's cracked up to be and asks the Pope what he is most looking forward to. "Well," says the Pope, "In Poland we have a deep spiritual attachment to Mother Mary. I suppose that the one thing I'm most looking forward to is to be able to convers with the Blessed Virgin herself."

Clinton smiles, turns to go and says, "You're a day late."

66 posted on 11/28/2001 3:27:10 AM PST by Non-Sequitur
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