Hi! I am submitting the attached article, "Chelsea's Big Adventure," for your consideration for publication in Talk Magazine. It is a parody of Chelsea Clinton's article about 9-11 in the current Talk Magazine issue.
If I were a less humble person I could engage in braggadocio and tell you that I have had thousands of humor articles published both online and offline (including in DOZENS of newspapers throughout the USA, Canada, and even Russia). However, since I am much too humble to engage in such blatant self-promotion, I will merely ask you to enter "P.J. Gladnick" into any of the online search engines and behold the genius that is me. Yes, you will see hundreds of articles written by Yours Truly PLUS over 500 pages of comix stories that I have written on my PJ's Comix (www.pjcomix.com) website.
Despite the fact that you will be overawed by my massive talent, I realistically know that the chances of Talk Magazine publishing a parody of one of their own articles is somewhere between nil and none. However, I hope you enjoy this parody (and don't forget to share it with friends).
On the outside chance that Talk Magazine falters in its judgement and actually published my parody, I am demanding payment of either $50,000 or a box of Black Jewell Premium Popping Popcorn (my favorite).
Thanx for taking the time to consider (and reject) my submission.---P.J.
Now I've got to get hold of myself before others in the office notice that the vice president [wife of the president] is about to have a cow in her office trying to keep from laughing out loud, LOUDLY. This is supposed to be a serious business.)
Popcorn! That's just perfect.