Whatever happened to please and thank you? (Vanity)

Me ^ | 11/14/01 | Me

[lds23]

Maybe I'm being petty, but I think it's the little details that inform how we look at the world. The decline of courtesy and manners is a well-worn adage.

But why do otherwise intelligent, well-dressed, and financially secure people treat service personnel like servants. At the Starbucks, the businesswoman says "I need a Large Capuccino". At the burger joint "Gimme a doublecheeseburger". Do they have so little self-esteem and respect that it would pain them to ask nicely?

Think of political discourse - it seems to run to "demands" for what is basically a handout from the government.

I'm no wilting flower, but wouldn't it make the day more pleasant? After all that's happened recently, you'd think we'd want to enjoy each day to the fullest.

[tiki]

I have two good please and thank you stories.

My grandaughter's mother is very rude and politeness hasn't been stressed. i just spent ten days with her and told her all the time how please and thank you were magic words. Towards the end of my visit we went to a magic show and the magician pretended to flub a trick and then said it must be because he didn't say any magic words so he asked the audience if they knew any and my granddaughter raised her hand and said 'please' which he kindly used to make the trick work.

Now my other son's family is just the opposite, please and thank you are used at home and in public and his kids are very polite. They were in California and my other granddaughter held the door for what turned out to be many people and NO-ONE said thank you. My son was seeing red and actually stopped one guy and pointed out the courtesy being extended and asked if he didn't think he should say thank you. Well, the guy did but he wasn't very happy about it.

[Leesylvanian]

Doesn't surprise me. I was just accused on another thread of being a racist by Ditto, who still accuses me of defending the beliefs of a Web site which I told him I have never heard of. Some people are just jerks, regardless of economic status, political beliefs, etc. Freep on!!!!

[Ol' Sox]

I've had an elegant sufficiency of cheese, thank you.

[Silly]

I'm not kidding you -- strange as it sounds, it is true.

And you are pretty much on the money on both of your speculations. I think I slightly misspoke about "addressing himself" -- it may be more when he is referring to himself. Or it may be both. So it could be the Bob Dole scenario, or just the "talking-to-himself" scenario.

And I was being facetious when I said few of us will have that opportunity. Only the person who is the Pope will have that opportunity. The rule only applies to him.

(On a totally unrelated note, "facetious" is one of the few words that uses each vowel once, and in alphabetical order.)

[Silly]

Those are great stories, and the second one brings to mind a little-known and frequently-broken rule of etiquette. Since it was your son who was involved in the story, please note that this is for discussion purposes only!.. :-)

It is considered rude to point out others' rudeness -- in fact, it is a worse violation than, say, neglecting to say thank you. Further, it is always incorrect to return rudeness with more rudeness.

Of course, it wouldn't have been impolite of your son to give the man a puzzled or surprised (but not annoyed) look, and say, "You're welcome."

[Silly]

Hi, Hillary!

[Silly]

Are you trying to divert our attention from your theft of the White House silverware? (Not that the real Hillary would know how to use a butter pick, let alone a chocolate muddler... actually, she'd probably just pick up the bowl of chocolate and drink out of it!)

[KateUTWS]

You have my permission, sir or madam, to properly chastise any uncouth person who would use "no prob" as a substitute for "your welcome". Bad manners gets under your skin doesn't it?

[Silly]

Point taken. By the way, did you know that the domain name "BlackPantSuit.com" is still available? Great satire potential for that site, especially if Hillary! intends to adopt that ugly outfit as a sort of "Hillary! Mao Suit" for perpetuity.

[AlGone2001]

For the most part, it is only going to get worse. I am amazed at how few children today truly know the difference between a right and a priveledge.

We should even be considerate of others when they are just simply not intruding on our rights.

I have a 5-year old boy, and a 2-year old daughter. They know that we expect them to say "yes sir", or "no m'am" to adults.

I hope that they are very successful in their careers, but they will be taught that it is wrong to walk on others to reach their goals, even if that means you start by being nice to young girl at the McDonalds drive-thru.

Thanks for the post!

[senorita]

That is not always the case.
I visit a Taco Bell in the city on occasion, and one
of the employees is obviously mentally challenged and he
is by far one of the most attentive restaurant workers
I have ever seen. He is very polite, asks to take your
tray and likes to make small talk. Just some little things
many of us "regular" people have forgotten.

Also, in Mexican culture (and others as well)it is very
important to use "please" and "thank you" and proper acknowledgement of those older than yourself.
If its a cultural thing, I think its an American cultural "thing". America has just gotten too busy
and we're all in a hurry.

I enjoy where I live out in the country.
I know my neighbors, I see kids at school during the week and at church on Sunday.
It's the little things in life that make each day more enjoyable.

[null and void]

Why? THEY have forgotten how to say "Thank You". It happened to me yesterday, I held the door open for two young ladies and not even a nod, glance or smile, they just kept on a walkin.

Lucky you, I've had 'em chew me out for being sexist.

Fvck 'em! That doesn't stop me...

[null and void]

Always open the door for a woman, not because she's a woman, but because you're a gentleman.

I like your 'tude better than mine. Thanks, dude!

[tpaine]

In predatory cultures like prisons or extreme poverty, politeness is a sign of weakness. Prison inmates have stated that they identify who the weakest prisoners are by who is being polite.
In addition, if you live in a rough neighborhood, being polite marks you as prey

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Yep, we are all 'prisoners', in a manner of speaking, of this predatory, government dominated socialistic culture.

Note that everyone on his thread rudely ignored your wisdom. -- And, -- that I am rudely reminding them.