[RandallFlagg]

Also:
Allow yourself ONE pastime that you can only do for ONE hour each week, insuring that you won't get any better at it.
For that Amphib carrier sailor in us all, pay a plumber to rig about 3000 of your neighbor's sewage systems to yours and wait for someone's kid to attempt flushing his sister's jacket.
Wait for public service to shut off your electricity...THEN pay it.
Break off ALL of your hot water taps.
Break off ALL of your cold water taps.
See how shiny you can make your floors with the cheapest wax you can find. When completed, strip all your floors and start over again. (Placing shoes on your dog and going to bed after laying a fresh coat of wax adds to the realism)

[soxfan]

Go to sleep for exactly one hour, then have some kid shine a flashlight in your face. Wake up, eat a plate of ravioli right out of the can. Connect two bricks with a piece of "rope" (six-thread for you nautical types), place around your neck, then at exactly 11:45 p.m., go outside on your porch and stand in a thunderstorm for exactly four hours. Repeat continuously for 6 months at a time.