The Bill of History . . . . . . . . . The Clinton of Faith
Posted on 10/26/2001 7:48:45 AM PDT by Liz
The townsfolk of Ballybunion, Ireland, thought they had an irresistible magnet for American tourists when they erected the world's only statue of Bill Clinton. They have found out otherwise.
Former roller-rink owner Frank Quilter talked his fellow businessmen into coming up with $39,000 to create a bronze likeness of our former President whacking a golf ball. But now the villagers have discovered that some of their visitors are Republicans, who have nightly donnybrooks in the pubs over the statue.
"It drives them mad," Quilter says. Tees them off, you might say. Clinton has visited the town twice. Mike Scanlon, who caddied for him, claims there were no presidential mulligans. But Scanlon tells T&L Golf, "He has a reputation for dropping balls, but none of us were going to say anything." (Clinton's office has denied reports of links chicanery.)
Clinton, who has spent a grand total of two hours in the village, doesn't seem to have done much to get his countrymen to linger. "It's worse that business has gotten," grouses a local woman.
Back in Little Rock, Clinton Presidential Library president Skip Rutherford is trying to have a groundbreaking by the end of the year — despite protests over the demolition of an 1899 train depot built by former slaves.
"It's a freight depot," Rutherford told us, adding that the foundation has given more than $30 million to restore the nearby passenger station, railroad bridge and park.
There isn't a statue planned for Clinton's library. No need: The former chief executive's Elvis memorabilia will be a draw. "The president has a large collection" of hundreds of Elvis objects, says Rutherford. Among them: a dancing Elvis phone and an Elvis clock with pendulum legs.
"You know," said Rutherford, "the most frequently requested presidential picture is the one of Elvis with President Nixon." Yeah, but then you have to go to all that trouble cutting Nixon out.
Making love in the afternoon with Ce-Celia
Up in my bedroom,
I got up to wash my face
When I come back to bed,
Clinton's taken my place.
Ce-Celia, you're breaking my heart
You're shaking my confidence daily.
Oh Ce-Celia, I'm down on my knees,
I'm begging you please to come home.
Jubilation,
She leaves Bill in pain,
I fall on the floor and I laughing,
Jubilation,
She loves me again,
I fall on the floor and I laughing
With apologies to S&G.
The Bill of History . . . . . . . . . The Clinton of Faith
well, I'm on if you are! Book yer flight Bubba *L*
THE TAOISEACH and Celia Larkin should stop going to Holy Communion if they are living in sin, according to a theologian.
Canon law expert Fr Maurice Dooley said if Mr Ahern "is living in concubinage with Celia Larkin, then neither he nor she is entitled to go to communion."
However, no priest can refuse communion to Mr Ahern or Ms Larkin unless he knows with certainty that they are in "a state of grave sin."
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