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Best of the worst headlines of 1996...
My desk drawer | Unknown | Unknown

Posted on 09/10/2001 7:31:53 PM PDT by Dixielander

1, Include your children when baking cookies.

2. High school dropouts cut in half.

3. Miners refuse to work after death.

4. Iraqi head seeks arms

5. Kids make nutritious snacks.

6. Hospitals sued by seven foot doctors.

7. Panda mating fails; veterinarian takes over.

8. Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers.


TOPICS: Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS:
Nothing political about this bit of humor. I just think its funny. Hope you do too.
1 posted on 09/10/2001 7:31:53 PM PDT by Dixielander
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To: Dixielander
Back in '90 I remember a tabloid headline, "Man cuts off own head with chain saw--AND LIVES!!" It still makes me chuckle every time I think about it.
2 posted on 09/10/2001 7:57:13 PM PDT by flushed with pride
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To: Dixielander
Best dopey headline every written was in the Times of London a couple of months after D day:

"Allies Push Bottles Up German Rear"

It would have been just fine of the copy editor had remembered to make "Allies" a plural possessive.

A couple of other good ones spring to mind, this one from the New York Post (where it may have been intentional):

"Martha Graham Beats Off Tax Man." And also, when the National Enquirer's owner died:

"National Enquirer Owner Goes to Meet With Elvis."

The Post also had a headline over a picture of Robert Reich and Janet Reno: "High and Mitey."

3 posted on 09/10/2001 8:06:29 PM PDT by Big Bunyip
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To: flushed with pride
How do they get away with such headlines? (Wonder how long the man lived after the accident.) LOL
4 posted on 09/10/2001 8:29:08 PM PDT by Dixielander
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To: Big Bunyip
Good ones, especially the Allies...

Some years ago a local newspaper received a "kudzu award" for the following headline.

Background: The organist at a church here quit his job to take one in Tucson. His name was J. Hooker.

"Calvary's Hooker Assumes Tucson Position"

5 posted on 09/10/2001 8:37:05 PM PDT by Dixielander
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To: Dixielander
Bump for a laugh - we can all use one.
6 posted on 09/10/2001 8:38:45 PM PDT by Rocky
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To: flushed with pride
follow this lonk to read about the guy who cut off his own head: http://www.googleplex.com/googleplex/weird_news.html
7 posted on 09/10/2001 8:40:36 PM PDT by isom35
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