Posted on 04/20/2025 4:13:07 PM PDT by rottndog
L.A.'s fragile urban canopy was dealt a vicious blow this weekend when a chainsaw-wielding vandal cut down a number of shade trees along South Grand Avenue and other areas of downtown, according to media posts and photos uploaded to Reddit and Instagram.
The Los Angeles Police Department told The Times it had no information about the tree destruction, and an email and phone call to the city's Urban Forestry Division went unanswered Sunday.
(Excerpt) Read more at yahoo.com ...
Did no one happen to think hearing chainsaws downtown was something to call the cops about?
Or is it like a man slashing pedestrians with a machete and then police question 20 bystanders, none of whom say anything they wish to discuss with them? Dinseenffin. Dinhearnuffin.
And the LA Police have no information.
$2.14 billion for the 2025-26 fiscal year.
8,832 sworn police officers as of 2024. Plus 3,000 unsworn civilian staff.
Cameras everywhere too...were the perps in The Camera’s Eye?
An idea for a future Rookie episode.
🎶There is unrest in the forest
There is trouble with the trees
Cuz a loony is hacking them to pieces
And the LA Council wants to give them a medal…🎶
Dang, beat me to it.
That is some evil crap there.
ISWYDT!
Blue states don’t let their police forces patrol anymore.
They might catch US criminals, criminal aliens and restore order.
.
Hey, it’s LA. Somebody must have figured that they were running low on burnable items.
};o]
Here’s a parody of the song I created with grok.
Here’s a parody of Rush’s The Trees, reimagined to reflect a loon cutting down trees in downtown LA. I’ve kept the structure and spirit of the original while tailoring it to the urban chaos and absurdity of the situation. For context, I’m assuming this “loon” is a quirky or misguided individual wreaking havoc on LA’s greenery, possibly inspired by real or exaggerated events. Since no specific news or X posts were provided about this incident, I’m leaning on creative license to craft a satirical take.
The Trees (LA Loon Parody)
There is unrest in the cityscape, Where the palm trees used to sway. The concrete hums with a strange complaint, ‘Cause a loon’s been hacking away.
The eucalyptus, tall and proud, Stood for years by the freeway’s roar. But the loon with his axe, he don’t care for facts, He’s chopping them down to the core.
“Oh, these trees block my view!” cries the loon with a grin, “I’ll make downtown sparkle and shine!” But the maples and oaks, they’re not taking the jokes, They whisper, “This fool’s lost his mind.”
So the loon keeps on swinging, his mission unclear, With a cackle that echoes through town. The sycamores fall, in the urban sprawl, Their branches crash hard to the ground.
Now the streets look bare, and the smog’s in the air, No shade where the food trucks convene. The loon’s got his way, but the people all say, “Where’s the green that our city once seen?”
But the loon don’t care, he’s still out there, Planning his next tree to fell. In the heart of LA, where the dreams fade away, He’s carving his own urban hell.
Maybe electric chain saw really quite.
Cool hand Luke updated with a chainsaw?
Yeah, think of all the paperwork (actually tablet entries but still work). Not worth leaving the donut shops for.
Walk Like An Egyptian
The Bangles
If you want to find all the cops
They’re hanging out in the donut shop
They sing and dance (Oh-way-oh)
They spin the clubs, cruise down the block
And the Chinese know
They walk the line like Egyptians
All the cops in the donut shop say
(Way-oh, way-oh, ooh-way-oh-way-oh)
Walk like an Egyptian.
Article says trees appear to be the invasive Indian Laurel figs, Chinese Banyon
From AI
Invasive Potential: While drought-tolerant and adaptable, it can be considered invasive in some areas, such as Southern California, due to its ability to outcompete native species.
Other Notable Features: It has a milky sap, and some varieties have aerial roots that can hang down from the branches and eventually reach the ground, forming pillar-like roots.
Could be up for Quietest Vandal of the Year.
Cat burglars win the Quietist Home Invasion awards.
Pretty good! And fast, too!
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