My fire hydrant story is me having problems with a guy that I red necked to shut him up in a 7/11 parking lot when I was trying to pick up a couple of girls and who was doing the passive aggressive response of following my friend and I to annoy me.
When we turned a corner I rolled out of the car and put a concrete block through his window as he passed, he lost control of his truck and ran over a fire hydrant, they look great when they are shooting water to the sky, the cops got him pretty good and there may even have been a DUI involved.
Your story is a whole lot better than mine! Sounded fun, too.