Daughter, later 20s and perfectly normal sexuality, is getting married soon. Her maid of honor is her best friend, who is a life-long lesbian. A little on the thicc side, but quite stunning, and she makes every effort in clothes, makeup, hair, and the rest to look and act completely feminine. She also has some of the common feminine psychological traits, such as always comparing her looks to others, or getting emotional about small things, or occasional doses of passive-agression. I’ve known my share of lesbian academics, and they are all as the rest of you have described, but not this woman.
Everyone has a secret life at odds with the public one. I’m betting that your daughter’s maid of honor has some pretty horrific private skeletons.