Posted on 12/13/2023 6:14:15 AM PST by Rummyfan
Been over quite a few of those bumps and I suspect there will be more before I cash in.
Once again CONGRATULATIONS on a GREAT MARRIAGE.
Most folks I see today never make it past the first five years, I think my brother is on his fifth now kinda hope this one sticks he is a year older than me at 73.
OOPS, that should be 74; birthday was just last month and I might be in denial (or going a little bit joe biden).
I know a number of women in this category. My ex is one of them. She has a number of friends that are also member of the club.
How many young men today, aged 18-25, are seriously considering marriage and fatherhood, and seek a girl with those goals in mind?
Exactly! And even if the guy definitely doesn't want children, he still definitely wants a woman still manifesting all the physical signifiers of being able to have a passel of kids.
It's like buying a car: What potential buyer, visiting the showroom, wouldn't prefer to drive off with the same car, same options, with the same price-tag, that had 200,000 less mileage on it? Unless he's not in his right mind (quite possible if the man is suffering from a "scarcity mindset" and has the unfortunate perception that he has no other viable choices and/or if the man is in the throes of intoxicating lust).
Of if you prefer a different analogy: It's like buying a 500-lb bag of coffee beans, and having a choice between two bags: One with a "best by"-date of 10 years in the future, and one that will expire next week. Even if the two bags are outwardly the same...
A 38+ man is highly unlikely to want a childless 38 year old woman for purposes of starting a family. A guy that age without kids is not looking longingly for fatherhood.
I beg to differ! At 38, I was sick and tired of a dating life consisting of long, lonely years of enforced celibacy, interspersed with short-term (18-24 months) relationships where the woman inevitably bailed because... reasons. (Those "reasons" being that she, as an attractive woman, was getting lavished with attention from men - attention which she mistook for serious interest in a long-term relationship. Seriously: A decent-looking woman in this age-bracket gets several propositions per week - and mistakenly equates almost each and every one with a genuine marriage prospect. This is the core problem of modern women!)
At 38, I was finally "coming into my own" career-wise. And, paradoxically, my exhaustion, frustration, and eventual giving-up of hope on the "dating scene" probably "did the trick" and gave me that je ne sais quoi that I had been lacking - the essential quality that women confuse with "confidence" and "self-assuredness" and find extremely appealing. I suddenly found myself with two 22-year-olds, both vying for my attention...
Regards,
It's only here that I must differ with you!
As you, yourself, pointed out: Male SMV and female SMV follow completely different trajectories; they tend to intersect at about age 34, where a woman's is steeply declining and a man's is steeply rising.
Hence, a man in his mid-thirties is finally a well-heeled buyer entering the showroom. If he has learned anything from his approx. 15 years of dating experience, he will now approach the matter in a more mindful fashion. His hormones have calmed somewhat, and his urges are now a mere 15 times stronger than those of the average woman - so he can finally think straight and make informed, rational choices. If he has conservative values, and has made wise life decisions (= gotten his finances in order), he now realizes that he can realistically "settle down" and offer a mate more than just a "fun time." Rather, he could offer a house and home (complete with nursery) at the drop of a hat, without the woman being expected to accept any compromises.
So why should he accept any compromises?
Regards,
Her biological clock has run down
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My wife and adopted two siblings when I was 63 and she was 56. We already had two girls and two boys that were adults by then. Women do have babies when in their forties too and she’s 39 now.
BJ1: Have you looked at what the 20-35 year old women are like? they are overwhelmingly libtarded and the majority of them are into their boss girl phase. Way too many for my liking are drinking to excess and letting every Tom, Dick and Harry into their bed. When the biological clock kicks in, suddenly they want a nice guy to settle down with. That poor sucker gets to pay new car price for something Tom, Dick and Harry rode for free. Yeah, I’m not going to suggest to younger guys to take one for the team and get one of these women.
BJ1 is absolutely right! The vast majority of American women of marriageable age are light-years away from having the proper mindset for settling down and forming a family.
And foreign-born wives do not necessarily dilute "American values." On the contrary, they tend (depending upon their origin) to still uphold the core values that made America great. And the typical age-disparity tends to cement the marriage.
Regards,
And his wife is HOW OLD?
Regards,
She’s faced with the realization that she’ll grow old and have no children to support and comfort her as she wanes physically and mentally and that she’ll likely die alone. She didn’t make good choices and pawning off her choices by the influence of feminism is just a cop out she hopes will convince some poor sucker to take her in (marry) and undo those poor choice. But it’s really too late for her.
But cats won’t help support her financially or be there to take her to the doctor, etc. when she’s old. That’s what’s in the back of her mind, IMO.
Amen!
As a man, a woman like this at her age and her demeanor is a BIG RED FLAG.
Men in that age-bracket are on the leading edge of increasing SMV. They would have to be hormone-driven fools to want to "settle down" at that age (and most of them just might be).
Instead, they should be working hard on getting their grubstake together.
In previous eras, men and women understood (and society knew and supported the idea) that men had not yet peaked at that age, whereas women had already passed their prime by that time. So there was an unspoken contract that a young woman (up to 22 years old) would "trade" her obvious, existent value as a woman in exchange for the "promise" inherent in a man of roughly the same age. She was, in essence, placing a "bet" on a man - that he would live up to the expectations placed in him and continue his upward trajectory. Society (the small community in which they lived) played guardian over that transaction.
By the same token, the young men were told that, if they controlled their randiness and agreed to surrender all their material resources, they could enter into stable relationships with untouched brides, who would remain faithful to them. These were ideal conditions for founding successful families.
These prerequisites are no longer in effect. The unspoken agreement has vanished, and there is no longer anyone there to monitor and enforce compliance. Rather, young women are now solely responsible for watching over their vast sexual resources. There is no one there to advise them, let alone discipline them. (Or rather, the advice that they are getting - from Feminism - is completely false.)
Regards,
How old were these two siblings when you adopted them?
Regards,
Geez…reading through posts on this thread and you stand out as quite the little self satisfied prig of a narcissist! I hope your lovely 16 years junior wife doesn’t read your judgmental generalizations about women and men. She might just run for her life.
Regards,
Bless you both! 🥰🙏🏼😍
I will readily admit to being "self-satisfied." I am, indeed, very satisfied with the outcomes I have achieved in this domain. I worked hard and exercised lots of discipline over a long period of time - and it finally paid off. At the same time, I recognize that I was also unbelievably fortunate to have "stumbled" upon my mate.
I find people like yourself who recklessly indulge in online invective / verbal abuse / psychological diagnoses of, essentially, strangers on the Internet rather... puzzling. You understand that ad hominem is a classic fallacy, right? That it convinces no one? I am guessing that you have no rational arguments in your arsenal, and thus have no other alternative than to indulge in name-calling.
I hope your lovely 16 years junior wife doesn’t read your judgmental generalizations about women and men. She might just run for her life.
Yes, she is lovely - but that's beside the point. In actual fact, I routinely share my postings with her. She is of the same opinion as I.
I do admit to making generalizations - general statements that might apply to only, say, 85% of the population. It would be very difficult to conduct a conversation without making generalizations, you know. A discussion punctuated by constant interjections of "but there are exceptions," "that's not always the case," etc. would be tedious indeed.
Regards,
I suppose it’s good that you didn’t have kids with her.
Still ... A pretty, younger woman on your arm is more important than America.
Still ... Rationalizing a decision that makes America weaker.
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