Something like this:
An email the first hour of the first day to All DOE employees (4,400).
Notice: Please be advised that starting in 90 days staffing at the DOE will be reduced by attrition and terminations at the rate of 209 per month. By the 24th month, I will terminate myself and will lock the door on the way out thus ending the tragic history of Jimmy Carters Department of Education. The annual budget of 68 billion can be applied to the National Debt.
That is a plan I can get behind.