Thank you for your mail which helps me to cope.
I especially appreciate your prayers that I will know that God loves Joy and me, too. I feel unworthy and it terrifies me to think of not being about to join Joy and God in Heaven.
Whenever I hear the Catholic, Jewish, Presbyterian and other strict rules I fear Joy and I have missed some adherence that will be disastrous. But I believe God is all love and compassion and will recognize Joy and the lesser in saintliness me as souls He will allow into Heaven. Joy never had the anger and grudge holding that are among my worst faults——she set aside anything bad done to her and forgave them instantly. So sweet to all.
A kind childhood friend of Joy’s reassured me that the strict, rigid types who set themselves above others with judgment on rules being followed or not, are not better and special——and should be ignored as intolerant.
Thanks for your prayers and mail. I have my ups and downs and realize grief can’t quickly be ended. I will pray for the 7 weeks widower and the former recluse and for you.
Best,
-Tom
Tom,
I totally agree with Joy’s childhood friend. Our God is a God of mercy, love and grace. God sees into our hearts. He desires that we are filled with love for each other and that we love Him. Joy had a heart filled with love. Lean into Jesus and trust Him.
Sometimes in church we sing “Humble thyself in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up”. God does love a humble heart. Trust Him more.
I belong to a church full of misfits. We are imperfect but the Lord is doing amazing work, cleaning each of us up and bringing us closer together as a family in Christ. I pray that you will find a church family to bless you and love on you.