April Ryan to Sec. Buttigieg: How Will Infrastructure Bill Help Deconstruct Racism Built Into Roadways?
Secretary Bootypig answered that to combat racism and gender discrimination on the all important Hershey Highways, the bill includes rearmarks for hundreds of millions of dollars in funding for special ventilated condoms.
These condoms will come only in a rainbow pattern, with a licensed BLM logo imprinted on them, and they will be distributed for free nationwide, but only to Biden-Administration certified groups who are publicly committed to swapping gender fluidity.
Bootypig chastened some in the press who did not recall his prior active military service, where, he explained, that though he had not yet publicly come out as gay, he understood “what was what” as he shared locker rooms and public showers with hundreds if not thousands of naked straight men on military bases.
"I learned that when you have a hard problem, you just have to work it harder!" Secretary Bootypig exclaimed on his way home to a breast-feeding session with his new children and his “husband.”
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