I’ve chickened out several times.
Ready to walk out the door, then I can’t.
Doing anything I’ve always done has become a mental war with myself in my own head.
The New World sucks.
I’m so sorry that you are so terrified. That’s a horrible way to live. I hope you find relief soon.
I don’t know where you live but here’s some advice based on where I am. I’m in a fair-sized city and belong to an online nextdoor.com group. Maybe you have a group in your area or neighborhood too. When the lockdowns hit, we immediately had neighbors posting that they’re willing to help others who need to stay in by shopping for them. Willing hands everywhere.
If that’s not available to you, I’d contact a local church or civic organization. We have elected township officials who also help in time of need. Any of these sources could be able to help or direct you to help.
If home delivery like Shipt or InstaCart isn’t available in your area, you might call the stores you frequent to see if they offer curbside pickup or other options.
I know it can be hard to ask for help and don’t know why so many of us are wired that way. Most people enjoy helping others but need to know what they need so they can. God bless.