Gays look like anyone else. So they bided their time and took the influential positions in corporations and government with no one the wiser because they look like heterosexuals but usually a bit more stylish. The family as they call moved on up and then we they had the positions they started the gay terraforming.
Some can pass as normal. Many can be spotted a mile down the road with their ridiculous attire, hormone grown whiskers, shaved heads or purple hair, exaggerated hand gestures and head wobbles, etc.