Fox Reporter: It’s 2024 and your probe is still going. Can you explain?
Meuller: Well, the wheels of justice grind slow and fine...
Fox Reporter: This is ridiculous, you have nothing and are still continuing.
Meuller: Remember, even Shakespeare talks about the delay of the law...
Reporter: Excuse me, but Trump has been in office for two terms and you have nothing to show on collusion or obstruction.
Meuller: We are now looking in whether he was thinking evil thoughts when petting his cat.
Fox Reporter: WHAT!
Meuller: See, the Russians are very advanced with mind control. We all remember the movie The Manchurian Candidate. We expect Putin is controlling his mind.
Fox Report: But Trump hasn’t broken any laws and you have no evidence for any of these claims.
Meuller: We have interviewed everybody yet. We think Kanye West and Rosanne are involved. Justin Bieber will be questioned next.
Fox Reporter: This is ridiculous why has’t the DOJ shut you down?
Meuller: They can’t shut us down till we tell them. That’s the agreement Comey had with Rosenstien and it is in writing too. It is legal.
Fox Reporter: So this witch hunt will continue till you find evidence?
Meuller: Look, when Trump pet that cat that was a big give away because it was a RUSSIAN BLUE! Sources tell us Russian Blues are the most seductive and devious cats and they have been known to work for the Kremlin.
Fox Reporter: Is there anything other than collusion and obstruction that you have on Trump?
Meuller: Well, he was not a nice person to Sessions and Stormy and that counts for a lot. That could tip at any moment, according to CNN, from impropriety into some form of legal jeopardy... and then we’ll have him.
Fox Reporter: There you have it folks.
Yes! The President may have also been whistling a dirty song while thinking evil thoughts when petting that cat. And he may have grabbed it too! It saw a bird and was going to jump out the window.
” Justin Bieber will be questioned next.”
Wait!
So, Trump may have had contact with Canadians too?
OMG!
The depravity of this man.
To be fair, I owe Justin Beiber my life.
You see, On March 9th, 2009, I was in a coma for 6 months after a terrible accident. One day my nurse turned the radio over to a song by Justin Bieber, so I got up and turned the radio off.
I will defend Justin and Trump til the end....