Any state that seceded would obviously need to settle accounts on a good faith basis eg gaining infrastructure on their territory but taking a portion of the national debt. By what power could a state leave if some people wanted to remain? Vote!
Divorce is not easy but forcing one of the partners to remain in by violent means converts the relationship from one based on consent to one based on violence.
Using divorce as an analogy to rebellion is stupid.
Which, you will note, the Southern states did NOT do before they left.
Divorce is a legal proceeding requiring both sides submit their case to a court of law and accept the verdict. How is that in any way like what the Southern states did?