The schools are on the absolute wrong track about bullying, and fighting at school. When I was in school, there was such a thing as self defense and if you had witnesses or could otherwise convince the Principal you were not the aggressor you were off the hook.
Now schools have a “zero tolerance” for bullying and fighting, so what happens is even if you try to physically defend yourself or another you are in just as much trouble as the aggressor. The bully often does not care if he is suspended or otherwise punished so they get away with bullying.
Students have been raised with this “zero tolerance” BS and they are convinced they cannot, must not stand up for themselves or another student. I think this builds to a frustration level that causes school threats, shootings, and suicide.
People say fist fighting doesn’t solve anything but I have seen it solve bullying and aggressive behavior. That is how it used to work, the kid being bullied or an older sibling or friend would beat up the bully and it worked. Might have been crude but it was effective. In my mind a fist fight is bad actually, but not as bad as shootings and suicide- or a kid putting up with years of bullying.
“People say fist fighting doesn’t solve anything but I have seen it solve bullying and aggressive behavior.”
This EXACTLY mirrors the hands-off never-touch child-rearing approach; no corporal punishment. The stupid reasoning is “how can you teach that violence is bad with violence?” Because the “violence” punishment is a REACTION, not being done for itself!
Zero tolerance is just another type of bullying. It is impossible to impose a one-size-fits-all policy; every situation must be considered in the context in which it occurred.
People say fist fighting doesn’t solve anything but I have seen it solve bullying and aggressive behavior. That is how it used to work, the kid being bullied or an older sibling or friend would beat up the bully and it worked.
To me, the argument that kids should learn to stand up for themselves is incredibly tedious. Not every kid is physically or mentally able to stand up for him or herself. Many victims of bullying do not have an older sibling or big friend to protect them. One of the hallmarks of bullying is that bullies are careful about who they decide to victimize. They don't choose kids who can fight back. They spread rumors and innuendo and create a toxic environment in which no one will talk to the victim or acknowledge that the victim is a human being. Giving the victim the message that he or she should learn to stand up for him/herself or, worse, that the victim should just tolerate the situation (it builds character!) just reinforces the feelings of despair and worthlessness that the victim already has.
While zero tolerance policies are bad, so, too, are attitudes that bullying should be ignored and allowed to continue unabated. If the behavior would land an adult in prison, or get an adult charged with violating EEO laws, then why is it okay to allow a child to behave that way?