“Even a simple compliment like “I love your shoes...”
C.D. Bales: [to two drunks that have just made fun of his nose] I really admire your shoes.
Drunk #1: What?
C.D. Bales: I love your shoes.
Drunk #2: What do ya mean?
C.D. Bales: And I was just thinking: as much as I really admire your shoes, and as much as I’d love to have a pair just like them, I really wouldn’t want to be IN your shoes at this particular time and place
That way, when you do criticize him, you're a mile away and you have his shoes.