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To: Iron Munro

riew awn rire awn rite awn

The Twelve Days Of Kwanza..by Shirley Q, Liquor

On the first day of Kwanza,
my childrens asked me, “mama what is Kwanzaa for, anyway?”

On the second day of Kwanzaa...
some lady bothered me. I cursed her out and I say “no, I don’t wan’t no Olan
Mills pictures and quit calling here!”

On the third day of Kwanzaa...
I went out to the store. I needed beer and cigarettes but they was closed,
so I smashed out the windows, did a drive-by and cursed em all out.

On the fourth day of Kwanzaa...
I turned on the T.V. Young and the Restless, All of My Children, One Day to
Live, and then “Oprah” at 4 o’clock.

On the fifth day of Kwanzaa...
My check came in the mail. AFDC! “Thank you Lord” I said, “come on kids,
let’s go to the store for some collard greens, hamhocks and some cheese.”

On the sixth day of Kwanzaa...
the police rang the bell. They served a warrant, I nearly passed out! But it
was ok, some woman had said I stole her wigs, but I told them all I was
gonna give them back anyway.

On the seventh day of Kwanzaa...
I poured myself a drink. I drank 40 ounces, got really full, then lost my
mind. I drove down the street cursing out everyone I saw. Then I bashed the
Cadillac upside a Dairy Queen.

On the eighth day of Kwanzaa...
I bought a TV Guide... not much had happened. I was hungover from a bad
headache from Schiltz Malt Liquor Bull. I tried to stay home and be quiet,
take my nerve pills... you can just feel Kwanzaa in the air.

On the nineth day of Kwanzaa...
I painted all my nails. Two shades of purple, one shade of turquoise,
throwed on some glitter, did ‘em up real nice. I was looking good! Then I
drove on down to Popeyes, bought me some chicken and I stayed home and
looked at T.V.

On the tenth day of Kwanzaa...
Shoplifting was the thing. ten Now or Laters, nine little candies, eight
cans of tuna fish, seven little niknaks, six pack of Budweiser, five Lee
Press-On Nails, four pieces of gum, three large fries, two days back in
jail... it was Kwanzaa, so what the hell?

On the eleventh day of Kwanzaa...
I got out on parole. I rolled a big joint, went down to church and talked
all out of my head. Got happy and shouted, passed out and hollered. They
called 911 and the Lord set me free! Gave my testimony, stepped on home,
didn’t even remember where I stayed, I woke up real hungry and confused.
LORD
On the twelfth day of Kwanzaa...
My childrens gathered around me. Lincoln, Alow vera, Gyne-Lotrimin,
LemonJello, OrangeJello, Tinactin, Tempasia, KMartina, Fallopia, Shi’Thead,
Shameka-Vonquishia, Salmonella, Chlamydia Champagne, Democtorius, Saskatoon,
Cheeto and Skuketia...
And it had really started to feel more like it was getting near Kwanza


14 posted on 12/27/2014 10:56:09 AM PST by MeshugeMikey ("Never, Never, Never, Give Up," Winston Churchill ><>)
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To: MeshugeMikey
The Seven Principles of Kwanzaa

Principle #1 Unity

Means helping each other stay together as families, communities, a nation, and a race.

MEANS STOP HAVING WELFARE BABIES OUT OF WEDLOCK AND STOP ABANDONING THEM.
DOES NOT MEAN HATING OTHERS FOR THE COLOR OF THEIR SKIN.

Principle #2 Self-Determination

This is the right to decide who we are, what our names will be, what we will become, and what we will create for ourselves.
We will not let others do these things for us.

MEANS STOP SUCKING ON THE GOVERNMENT TEAT.
MEANS STOP MOOCHING OFF PEOPLE WHO WORK FOR A LIVING.

Principle #3 Collective Work and Responsibility

This means we should build and take care of our communities. We should work together to solve our problems.

"WORK" MEANS GET JOBS.
"RESPONSIBILITY" MEANS STOP TRASHING YOUR NEIGHBORHOODS AND COMMUNITIES

Principle #4 Cooperative Economics

This means that we should build and maintain our own stores, shops, and businesses. We should profit from them together.

WARNING !!! - REQUIRES ACTUAL WORK.
PROFIT IS SOMETHING EARNED, NOT SOMETHING HANDED TO YOU BY THE GOVERNMENT.

Principle #5 Purpose

Our purpose should be to make our people and communities as great as they can be.
We can do this by taking care of our homes and communities and developing the skills and knowledge of all our people.

MEANS STOP BEING CRIMINALS AND STOP PROTECTING CRIMINALS
MEANS STOP LOOTING AND BURNING HOMES, BUSINESSES AND CITIES

Principle #6 Creativity

As African American people we should do as much as we can, in our unique way, to make our homes and communities more successful and beautiful.

"CREATIVITY" DOES NOT MEAN MAKING UP RIDICULOUS UNPRONOUNCABLE HOMEMADE NAMES FOR YOUR CHILDREN
"UNIQUE" DOES NOT MEAN WEARING YOUR PANTS DOWN TO YOUR KNEES

Principle #7 Faith

We strive to believe with all our hearts in the worth of African Americans. We believe in the struggle and victory of our people.

"FAITH" IS GOOD. FALSE SELF ESTEEM IS WORTHLESS
"STRUGGLE AND VICTORY" DOES NOT REFER TO THE "KNOCKOUT GANE" OR DRIVE-BY SHOOTINGS.


47 posted on 12/27/2014 4:34:44 PM PST by Iron Munro (Conservative Epitaph: Don't Cry For Me , You Still Have Two More Years Of Obama)
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