Geeze man, I got hit by 70’s era Phone handsets, curtain rods, ping pong paddles, broom handles, belts, shoes, flashlights, hair brushes, wooden spoons, salad bowl tongs ... almost everything but a switch ... whatever my Irish mother could find.
That sounds about right. My Scots-Irish mom once broke a rake over my head. And yes, I had it coming. BTW, I’ve seen your tagline attributed to C.S. Lewis a few times.
CC
As a kid, my best friend’s mom would threaten us with her big wooden cooking spoon.
The dreaded shoe! Them clod hoppers when flung properly could hurt but i deserved it. Never spanked my kid here though but did put him against the wall once and cracked the dry wall with him. He knew from then on to never give him mom any crap.