No, this could work. Slow Joe goes up to Putin and says, “Hey, Vlad, baby - they want me to tell you this. Evacuate Crimea or they’ll remove me from office and bring back Dick Cheney. I don’t know what that means, exactly...hey, Vlad! Vlad! Where you goin’?”
I don’t know that bringing back Cheney is the thing to do, but I remember well Cheney’s cool when we hastily inserted light forces to stop Saddam Hussein dead in his tracks when the Hussy invaded Kuwait and threatened Saudi Arabia with his “million man army”. Our soldiers were magnificent, too. “The Battle of Kafji” soon followed.