But what if the situation is really reversed; that everyone really doesnt care about being obedient to God regardless of the consequences? If this last scenario is true, then God is on a rescue mission to save some of us from the fate that we purposely want for ourselves.
And once they have made the easy decision that the eternal suffering meme is baloney, it is very easy for them to throw the whole thing out. I see the reverse when I enter anti-Christian threads that always come to the “what kind of loving God would sentence most people to an eternity of conscious suffering” point. And as Christians try to connect these unconnectable dots for them, I enter the thread with, “Where does the bible say such a thing?”
It starts a dialogue that goes in a completely different direction. What is comical is the strongly “anti-christian” folks find themselves in a position of defending the “eternal suffering” meme. At least, it would be comical if it were not so serious.
Personally, I understand your confusion. But the dots ARE connectable. It's simply that most Christians have the wrong understanding of the biblical context of God. I would recommend a study on the difference between monergism and synergism. These are two entirely different perspectives of God. Most believers subscribed to synergism which has warped views on hell, heaven, knowing God, justification, atonement, on and on and on. Monergism focus on God's sovereignty. If you understand the sovereignty of God you'll understand the answers (well, most). As my friend Dr. E would say, there are very few shades of grey.
God is loving. We are not. If we understood this we wouldn't get wrapped up in "Why would a loving God give us eternal torment?" The answer to that question is that we ask for it-maybe not directly but we still ask for it. It's like the rich man and Lazarus, we wouldn't even ask forgiveness if we saw the feast of Abraham right before our eyes and we were burning in hell. That's how evil we are. The problem is few wants to admit they're evil. It's all this, "I'm OK, You're OK." nonsense that float around us-not only in the secular world but in the Christian world as well.
All God wants us to do is to admit that we're this way and ask Christ His Son to cleanse us from this attitude. That's it. And then one will know God exists.