So this guy calls me up, some guy who got up and talked at the Sussex county meetings, a passing face. He contacts me by email via my column than asks if he can call me.
Seems he has , really, the neighbor from hell. Neighbor lives on 4.1 acres, zoned agricultural/residential....little of both. Can have 8 hogs is all, two cows....got rules for it all in the Sussex county code.
Neighbor had, get this, 27 pigs, dug a big lake in his yard that attracted ducks, than duck hunters. And, get this, neighbor SLAUGHTERED all those pigs IN HIS YARD!
Anyway, guy is despondent, he’s trying to tell the Sussex county council his story and he sure can’t write, trust me on this.
So he begs me to compile his sorry tale and you know what? I did. He sent me a notepad file with a bunch of research he did, pretty thorough, it was small matter for me to put it all in a letter.
We talk, he mentions his Ex-wife and how she left him with a Pomeranian.
When I finally email him a decent letter detailing his story, which was guys....really, hilarious. This is the stuff of fiction BUT IT’S TRUE!
So he loves my letter, makes copies of it all over the place, then....heh. Guess what?
He will buy me lunch at a Georgetown restaurant of my choice. This AFTER he shows me his little farmette thing or whatever he lives in....get a gander at that nutjob neighbor of his.
I mean....to the men! It’s tough being a sex object but somebody’s got to do it.
Anyway....we’ll see. I go to the Tuesday Sussex county council meetings cause I know where to park, can stop at GOP headquarters, got some Facebook friends and always visit beloved Billy’s grave, which is in Georgetown.
I figured, hey I’m opting for lunch on the Circle....a little tavern type restaurant, really historic, on the Georgetown circle....kind of a tourist thing. But I have never been there and the only other choice is the Georgetown restaurant, an all right place but come on, they serve “dumplings” that are like noodles of some kind....Sussex county dumplings they call them, slimy things.
We shall see, yon reader shall smile.
Yeah, my German mother and grandma used to make "Chicken and dumplings". It seemed to be boiled chicken, pulled off the bones, in its broth, with big lumps of cooked dough.
“I mean....to the men! It’s tough being a sex object but somebody’s got to do it.”
Hi Sister Pat!
Well, these dudes are finding out something we’ve known for quite some time.
Please send me your tips and hints via FReep mail - - I’d like to know your secrets so I can be one, too :-)