One thing about volcanoes— they never listen.
Not according to traditional believers in our newest state. Pele, the volcano god, can be appeased. Find the most important Hawaiian you can and feed him to the volcano.
What are you implying????
(knowing full well what you are implying)
I suppose Pele might not be requesting the most important Hawaiian, but rather a virgin Hawaiian. In that case, feed Pele the Hawaiian with the virgin birth certificate.