talk about getting the milk without buying the cow....
I'd like to shake these gals and tell them they should demand more respect for themselves than to be educated, working and buying houses with their new found wages, or having a baby before getting the guy to committ....silly, and financially stupid...
my cranky old FIL told me something....that after WW2 when the Gi's were home, he said if a guy met a girl he liked he would ask her to get married right away, because if he waited even a while and played finicky, she would be married off to someone else...such was the demand for marriage ready young women....
and now, a guy can get the sleepins and the house and the baby for nothing at all....sweet deal...
You’re actually more likely to get rejected and dumped if you want marriage.
Maybe it's a bit of a generation gap here (Grandpa was WWII, I was born in the 70's and I'm in my mid-30s). I couldn't do that. Without going into things that ended up with me needing to go to confession. I came this close to proposing about 3 years ago, but deep down I knew it wouldn't work out for a few reasons I'm not going to get into here.
The lady I'm dating now, we'll see. I'm thinking positive here, if she can get past the age difference (I'm younger) :)
Is it such a sweet deal. Short term, yeah, in my early-mid 20's. Frankly, it was there in my dad's day and probably grandpa's day too, although neither would admit to it. Long term? No. Too many people like how I used to be.
The comparision with the 1940s is inaccurate.
In the 1940s marriage and the church were respected by government. In many cases a divorce required approval by the church. And child support was only ordered by the state as terms of a divorce and alimony. This arraingement favored marriage for both men and women.
Today child support and state benefits are granted without a requirement for marriage. In addition not marrying provides both the man and woman more finacial advantage than marrying in the case of separation. So there are substantial financial incentive for both men and women for not marrying, particularly for men and wage earning women. For many women it’s a choice of single parenting or no parenting so more women have children out of wedlock.
Even in a bad economy bills have to be paid and kids taken care of.
Take the government out of marriage, child rearing and church and the situation will right itself.