Doc, let’s make some scotch.
Scotch?
As naval officers, we’re supposed to be resourceful.
Frank here’s got a great opportunity. Let’s fix him up.
Right.
Frank, where is the rest of that alcohol we were drinking last night?
-Now, that ain’t even the right color.
-Quiet, boy.
Color?
Coke. You got any?
l haven’t seen a Coke in four months. No, it’s five months.
l forgot l had it.
What shade would you like?
Shade?
Pale, smokey?
Well, l told her Red Label.
-Red Label?
-Red Label.
lt may look like it,
but it sure won’t taste like it.
Doc, what does scotch taste like?
lt tastes like....
You know what it’s always tasted a little like to me?
lodine.
Of course.
One drop of iodine, for taste.
Let me try that.
This calls for a medical opinion.
How about it?
We’re on the right track.
Now we need something extra for age.
What have you got there, Doug?
Seltzer, some fruit salts, hair tonic....
Hair tonic! That’s got a coal tar base.
One drop of hair tonic, for age.
That’ll age the daylights out of it.
That’s it!
You know, it does taste a little like scotch.
Do you know, it does.
That dumb little blonde will never know the difference!
All right, Frank,
Doug and l made the scotch...
...the nurse is your department.
‘’She won’t know the difference
She won’t know the difference’’
Thanks, Doc.
‘’She’ll never know the difference’’
You won’t know the difference,
will you, baby?
No, you won’t. No, you won’t.
Thank you, Doc. Thanks, Doug.