I wish they’d just use ‘homosexual lover’. The words ‘queer’, ‘gay’ & ‘partner’ now have had their original definitions completely twisted over the years...
I think queer is accurate, but there is nothing "Gay" about homosexuality or any other aspect of queer culture.
You are so right. Years ago I used to tease a female cousin with outlandish remarks. Her response would be something like ‘you are kind of queer’. Never did she doubt my attraction to the opposite sex. I used to never mind when someone at a party would say/ask isn’t this a ‘gay’ event. The homos sure knew how to use language to legitimize, in their minds at least, their perverted natures.