LOLOLOL.
I’m in tears from laughing so hard. “Despair” is the prefect word.
We must pray for someone to put a substance into or onto the ice image. LOL.
Sugar water would attract armies of ants.
"No, the sculpture wasn't supposed to be black, but look... it's a miracle!" ;-)
Good fortune would dictate that the Chinese craft this one. Then we can be certain that it will have major issues. The thing could just shatter for no apparent reason, or have its face fall off, or something. The destruction would even serve to resurrect the worn out internet meme, "The fail is strong with this one."