Thu column ping—a bit of yesterday’s web exclusive
re-written with at least one idea from a listener!
(”Technically, it is not illegal to be Tim Cahill in Massachusetts.”) And Howie put in one quip he made
during the Chumpline, about Mistral/Mistrial.
Chalk up yet another flub to Marsha
By Howie Carr | Thursday, December 13, 2012 | http://www.bostonherald.com | Columnists
You’re Martha Coakley, and you’re wondering, who the hell talked you into indicting Tim Cahill.
You set up this whole new anti-corruption unit to get yourself a hack’s scalp or two, and what do you have to show for it? Just another round of those same old jokes about “Marsha” Coakley.
If you want to hide something real good, just stick it in one of Marsha’s law books.
When it comes to finding crooked pols, Marsha will leave no stone unturned ... except the one the perps are hiding under.
Somewhere Tooky Amirault is smiling.
Old Marsha Coakley quote: “Technically, it is not illegal to be illegal in Massachusetts.”
New Marsha Coakley quote: “Technically, it is not illegal to be Tim Cahill in Massachusetts.”
Tim Cahill is a laughingstock, but suddenly when he goes up against Marsha, he turns into Scott Brown — the Scott Brown of 2010.
Is it too late to indict Dianne Wilkerson and Chuck Turner one more time? To paraphrase John Kerry, can I get me a hunting license for a House speaker here?
If only you could have charged Cahill with open and gross stupidity. ...
But now he gets to limp back to the hospitality industry.
There’s already that chi-chi joint on Columbus Avenue named Mistral, so maybe Cahill can call his place Mistrial.
Meet your friends in the Unindicted Coconspirator Room! Order the hottest new drink in town, the Mad Marsha Martini.
You’re Marsha Coakley, and AG seemed like such a comfortable gig. All you had to do was go along to get along, like the corrupt sheriff in Jim Thompson’s novel “Pop. 1280,” who knew he had it made “as long as I didn’t arrest no one unless I just couldn’t get out of it and they didn’t amount to nothin’.”
You know, someone like ex-state Rep. Brian Wallace of Southie.
Why didn’t you just go the Wallace route with Cahill — refer the case to the State Ethics Commission and settle for a heavy fine ($35,000). Brian Wallace, a poor little fat guy, his life ruined for unitemized Twinkie purchases.
You’re Marsha Coakley, and you know, you just know, that down on Northern Avenue, Carmen Ortiz is having a good chuckle right now.
And you also realize that Gov. Patrick really does want her to succeed him, because for one thing, she’s not from Massachusetts, and you are, which means you can never really be part of the Deval gang.
How come every other prosecutor with a million e-mails for evidence can get a conviction, and you can’t?
You’re Marsha Coakley, and why didn’t you skip that fundraiser in D.C. at the end of 2009? Why didn’t you shut up about “standing outside Fenway Park [map]” in the cold? Why didn’t you know that Curt Schilling [stats] was not just “another Yankee fan.”
Why oh why oh why?
If wishes were horses, Marsha Coakley would fly.
Article URL: http://www.bostonherald.com/news/columnists/view.bg?articleid=1061181602
btw the latest
AP/Herald
A law enforcement official says the suspect in the Connecticut school shootings is 24-year-old Ryan Lanza and that his younger brother is being held for questioning as a possible second shooter. The law enforcement official says the boys’ mother, Nancy Lanza, works at the school as a teacher. The official also said Ryan Lanza’s girlfriend and another friend are missing in New Jersey. Speaking on condition of anonymity, the official said the suspect is dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound. The official spoke on the condition of anonymity because the source was not authorized to speak on the record about the developing criminal investigation.
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Setting the stage for Scott Brown vs. the world
Friday, December 14, 2012
I’m going to see U.S. Sen. Scott Brown tomorrow afternoon in Orleans. It was just supposed to be a book signing for both of us. Now maybe it’ll be the unofficial kickoff to the 2013 U.S. Senate race.
Not that we’re all hoping U.S. Sen. John “Liveshot” Kerry is finally, finally on his way out. Hey, Senator, here’s your hat, what’s your hurry?
What a great secretary of state Liveshot will make if only Obama will give him the nod. Talk about impeccable judgment. This is a guy who wanted John Edwards to be a heartbeat away from the presidency. Last year he trekked to Damascus and assured everyone that Syrian president Bashar al-Assad was a reformer and a very decent man.
Liveshot can really pick ’em, can’t he?
But the man can get things done. Just ask that fire hydrant that used to be in front of his mansion.
What matters is that, knock on wood, Kerry’s gone, and now Brown has another shot. Sure, he’ll be the underdog again, but what else is new? He’s a Republican in Massachusetts.
A lot of what remains of the local GOP is still shell-shocked from Nov. 6. They can’t believe Scott lost to an empty pants suit like Granny Warren. But he just happened to be standing on the beach when the tidal wave hit.
Assuming the Democrats don’t change the Senate succession law for the third time — granted, a big if — the election to replace Kerry will probably take place sometime in May or June. Can John Walsh and his pinky-ring union thugs reassemble their EBT coalition?
The next question is, who’s Brown running against? Last time out, the Democratic machine was able to muscle aside everyone for the fake Indian (and then raise her $42 million). But now they won’t have a state convention with its 15 percent requirement for a candidate to get on the primary ballot.
This time, it’s every moonbat for himself. This time, it’ll be more like, gulp, democracy.
Deval Patrick? No, he’s about money. A Senate seat wouldn’t enable him to live in the style his adventures in steam control (as Tom Wolfe would say) at Coke and Texaco have accustomed him to.
Let’s go down the congressional list. Ed Markey’s wanted this seat since 1984, but he could never risk his safe seat, lest he lose and starve to death. One of his only jobs in the Dreaded Private Sector was driving an ice cream truck. Now Mr. Frosty will have a free shot.
Ditto, Mike Capuano. He’s morphed from an unrepentant Somerville hack into a twitchy, MoveOn mouth-breather. Remember his exhortations to his union thugs on the Common about spilling a little blood?
Then there’s Steve Lynch. What would have once been his electoral strengths are now a toxic stew of liabilities — Irish-Catholic, South Boston, heterosexual, former ironworker.
To more than half of today’s Democrats, Lynch is a walking hate crime.
Scott Brown will be at the Booksmith Musicsmith in Orleans at 1 tomorrow.
Bring signs. Also bring money.
http://bostonherald.com/news_opinion/columnists/howie_carr/2012/12/setting_stage_scott_brown_vs_world