Is Jon Lovitz for real or is he drawing out Hollywood’s closet conservatives?

Bookwormroom.com ^ | 5-11-2012 | Bookworm

[servo1969]

Here’s an old, bad (really bad) joke:

During the 1973 war, the Israeli Army determined that at least one third of all Arab forces arrayed against them were named Mohammed. They quickly developed a new tactic. The IDF troops would take cover and holler out, “Mohammed!” In response to the call, one third of the Arab troops would jump out of their cover, and the Israeli forces would pick them off.

You couldn’t fool the Arabs for long. They figured out that at least one third of all IDF troops arrayed against them were named David. They too quickly developed a new tactic. From cover, they would holler out “David!”

They tried it in the field of battle. “David!” they’d holler. The Israeli troops would answer back, “Mohammed, is that you?” At which point one third of all Arab fighters would jump out of their cover, and the Israeli forces would pick them off.

I did say it was a bad joke, didn’t I?

There’s nothing new about using whatever means possible to flush someone or something out from cover in order to shoot it down. This is a duck call:

And here’s the product description for this little doo-dad:

This is the ultimate one call that will do it all. From loud ringing hail calls, raw, hang-it-all-out duck, to super sexy, soft, up close, “put your landing gear down” calling. This call was designed to be easy for the average caller to operate.

Put more simply, blow on that little sucker, and the ducks will come flocking towards you, putting themselves in easy gun range.

Here’s my question for you. Is this guy also a duck call?

Why do I ask? Because of this:

[Video]

My first thought was “I hope Lovitz inspires Hollywood’s conservatives to come out of the closet.” And then, paranoid being that I am, my second was, “I wonder if he’s not a stalking horse (or duck call), who is trying to entice Hollywood’s currently invisible conservatives out into the open, the better to black ball them professionally.

As both the George Clooney dinner last night and the rapturous responses to Obama’s cynical gay marriage announcement proved, Hollywood may be playing a bit coy now, but it’s still in Obama’s pocket. To switch metaphors yet again, that coyness allows the Hollywood liberals to pretend an injury in order to deceive its prey (i.e., Hollywood conservatives), thereby flushing that prey out from its cover.

Am I paranoid? I don’t know. I do know that, after I did my write-up about Andrew Breitbart’s appearance in Mill Valley, Andrew called and asked me to edit it slightly to provide more cover for Hollywood’s conservatives. It’s dangerous out there for them. If I’m paranoid, I’m not the only one.

[wrencher]

Boycott Hollyweird, they’re the reason most Americans are addicted to their TV’s.

[rmlew]

In honor of this, I demand new episodes of The Critic

[willyd]

Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer is his best work...lol

[itsahoot]

I haven’t been in a theater in years. Went to an Imax and watched some really neat 3D stuff, don’t even remember what it was.