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To: iowamark

Going the route of least treatment can be the most humane, especially if it involves chemo and radical treatments, but every situation is different.

The flip side of this is when a patient is in a coma, and the patient’s stated wishes were that everything reasonable, including life support, be available. This would not include unreasonable major surgeries with a low chance of success.

My experience has been, at least at one major hospital, that when the patient had gone into a coma for only a FEW days, the doctors quickly went death panel on me and pushed to end all treatment.

The patient was my wife, 49, who had a stroke, and a brain tumor was found. The prognosis was bad, but her vital signs were good, and ending her life would have barred any chance for a miracle. Once in a coma, the doctors did pain tests and brain activity tests and found she felt no pain.

Yet they still pushed me to consider her “quality of life”, saying further treatment could be “cruel” and cause her to suffer. I refused to have the breathing tube removed, citing that since she was in a coma and out of pain, that no one could ascertain her quality of life, and that she indeed may be in a state of peace. She passed away on her own a few days later, 4 months ago. If I had followed the insistence of the doctors, I couldn’t have lived with the decision. So there’s many sides to these situations, and it can come down to a specific doctor’s philosophy or the patient’s, vs. the hospital. And sorry for the unpleasant post.


12 posted on 12/07/2011 1:58:33 AM PST by drierice
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To: drierice

Amen! I pray that God gives you strength to walk through this and help others with your wisdom learned and perhaps find joy in life again


19 posted on 12/07/2011 2:22:11 AM PST by winodog
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To: drierice
I'm sorry for your loss. You must still be feeling the pain of loss. She was young and I know how you probably feel, my husband was 51 and had his first and last heart attack. No history of heart problems and he passed on sitting in the shade of his pick up truck while we were putting up hay in the barn....It seems forever my giving him CPR. before the ambulance arrived but we lived in a rural area...

Everyone needs to make sure the doctors follow the family wishes...Ihave heard doctors give family's prognosis but never heard one trying to force an opinion and for you, you did the right thing in the choice you made..no one person should try to push a decision on someone that they don't feel is the right decision...good for you being strong....

Your post was very good and sometims when we talk of such things on FR what we say may also be important to some other freeper that might be faced with the same situation

May God grant you peace and healing........GG

20 posted on 12/07/2011 2:22:42 AM PST by goat granny (.)
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To: drierice

Sorry for your loss. I’ve been there!


65 posted on 12/07/2011 5:37:09 AM PST by Coldwater Creek (He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty Psalm 91:)
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To: drierice

Your post was beautiful - you’re in my prayers, drierice. Thanks for sharing.


123 posted on 12/07/2011 1:26:53 PM PST by GOPJ (Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, Than a fatted calf with hatred - Proverbs 15)
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To: drierice
My sympathies to you in the loss of your wife.

May she rest in peace.

God Bless you.....

158 posted on 12/08/2011 4:04:11 PM PST by Churchillspirit
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To: drierice
Well....I'm in the Health Care biz.

Every case is different....

I'm so sorry for your loss.

My older sister died..in 2000..of a brain stem stroke. She was also 49!! It broke my heart!!

She was taken off of the ventilator after 24 hrs. Because there weren't any brain waves....and she wasn't "there". No pain, no feeling.....

I understand your post. I've been there, on both sides of the bed.

Regards,

159 posted on 12/08/2011 4:10:19 PM PST by Osage Orange (HE HATE ME)
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To: drierice

Your post is beautiful. So sorry for your loss of your wife. I can’t imagine the pain, but you have peace knowing you made the right decision for your wife and yourself.


160 posted on 12/08/2011 4:23:22 PM PST by EDINVA
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