Maybe they should outlaw obesity; make it a felony.
Try this kid as an adult; lock him up.
They want to lock us all up anyway; this seems like a good place to start.
Create new Controlled Substance Act of 1970 categories for various foods.
Have Moochelle do it by Executive Order.
Create a War on Foods.
Create an offshoot of the DEA: the Food Enforcement Administration.
Get the FEA lots of high tech surveillance and SWAT-like anti-personnel equipment, and throw out due process.
Have them partner with a newly-expanded BATFE that now sports an F (for Food) at the end.
Much food comes from Mexico - get ICE involved.
Obesity is a national security issue - get DHS involved.
Kids get much food at schools - get DOEd involved.
Have the FDA require that all food be dispensed at government facilities with a doctor’s Rx, and that the growing and processing and packaging and distribution of all food (and water?) be controlled by the Federal government.
Have the FBI coordinate with the other agencies to insure that the inevitable graft and crime is punished, except when politicians and bureaucrats are involved.
Pass a new stimulus package - say $4.8T - to get the ball rolling.
Yeah. That’s the ticket.
Shhh, don't give them any more ideas.