To quote Larry the Cable Guy.....
“It’s better to burp and taste it than to fart and waste it.”
AND.....(not from Larry)
A cowboy, an Indian, and a Muslim were riding a train across the great plains. The cowboy seemed to be sleeping with his hat pulled down over his face. The Indian and the Muslim were talking.
The Indian said, “We once ruled this land as far as the eye can see. Once we were many, now we are few.”
The Muslim replied, “Now we are few, but soon we will be many. And WE will rule this land.”
The cowboy tipped his hat back and said, “Yeah, but we ain’t played cowboys and Muslims yet!”
LOL! Although if only our military were allowed to actually fight and win in Afghanistan, it really would be “Cowboys & Muslims”.
OK, here’s the only joke that’s always ready in my head:
What do you get when you play a country song backwards?
You get your wife back, your job back, your pickup truck back, and you sober up.
(See Rascal Flatts on youtube on this subject)