I went to 6 different schools in two different states. My husband went to 14 different schools in 2 different states. It’s pretty much the same everywhere. Just because teachers don’t know about it doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. I loved learning but hated school. Most of the teens in our church want to be home schooled. They have asked me to homeschool them but legally I cannot.
The good schools are the ones that are rare not the other way around.
Your experience is atypical. Sounds like your husband didn’t even make it through a year at the same school. Were you military families?
Certainly the situation you describe is not typical of smaller schools or private schools. Nor does it fit any of the suburban schools around my area.
You seem to believe there is practically open warfare in almost all schools. In actuality the danger in schools is completely in proportion to the number of welfare families within them.
Schools being used to do more than they were intended to do (educate kids) is the main reason there are failures. Now they are expected to be surrogate parents for the welfare class.
I also suspect you expect different things from schools which they cannot provide.