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In your defense, you may not have ever been exposed to this kind of behavior so you may not be able to understand the behavior or you were exposed and didn't realize it (did you ever watch “The Karate Kid” or old westerns where the gunfighters kept starting trouble?)

Bullies like to impress their friends by picking on those who seem weak or defenseless. In this video, the bully has two friends who are laughing, enjoying, and making a video to record the bully's actions to torment the big kid. This is the only way to interpret it using what we call ‘common sense’.

I was introduced to bullying on a playground when I was probably 4 years old by a kid who threatened me with a sharp stick. Then again in the 5th grade by a kid who had been held back a grade or two. If he liked my nice pencil, it was his. I gave it to him because I was afraid of him. But he ‘liked’ me so no one else picked on me. When I move to California later that year, some kids decided to ‘bully the new kid’ so they picked at me every day trying to pick a fight. But I was a shy kid and didn't want to get into trouble at school knowing the trouble I'd get into at home. Finally, I decided I'd have to take a beating (better from the bully than my old man) so I said ‘let's fight but not here, let's go over to the Park because I don't want a teacher to break us up’. He thought about it for a minute and decided it wasn't worth the effort (or the risk) and they left me alone.

I raised 5 sons and taught them things like ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you’, ‘watch out for each other’, and ‘don't start a fight but if pressed, be sure to finish it.’ In 10th grade, one son was in a boarding school and was being picked on relentlessly by a kid (in their group of friends) to the point of an actual permanent injury to an eye. During his holiday visit he told me about the kid but couldn't understand why he was being picked on. I explained the concept of a basic animal behavior called ‘pecking order’ and how bullies like to pick on others, putting them ‘down’ in order to elevate themselves in the ‘pecking order’. I told him to carefully pick a time when all of their friends were there and when the kid picked on him, go ‘beserker’ on him, grab him around the neck, throw him to the ground and start pounding his face. I told him his friends would eventually pull him off the kid and that once the story got around, no one would ever attempt to mess with him again. When he returned to school, such a time occurred in gym class, the bully began to mess with him and the bully was surprised by the quickness of my son who took him down and started pounded his face (while the gym teacher ‘turned and looked in the other direction’) for a few minutes. Word got around and no one ever tried to pick on him again.

I could give you more examples but if you don't get it by now, it would be a waste of my time. Needless to say, no matter what school they were in, no one ever tried to bully one of my kids more than once after that. If our schools were able to nip this kind of behavior in the bud, they would but sometimes they can't unless they are forced by the parents.

As parents we have to have an open dialogue with our kids and find out what's going on at school. If we don't, we can't help them through these really rough periods in their lives. Many a child has committed suicide because of these relentless attacks on their persons and self esteem.

It's hard for most folks to understand but it goes on every day, in almost every school. Parents need to talk to their kids at an early age and explain it to them so they'll know how to deal with it the correct way (fighting is not the best way, but sometimes it's the only way). Get school officials involved early, with a personal visit and using written correspondence (in case legal action is required later). You put enough heat on the school and hopefully they'll take action. If you ever see this kind of behavior going on, I would hope you'd step in and stop it. These bullies need to be put in their place. Good job Casey.